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May 30, 2013

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Around 3 is usually when I had another baby, so when my youngest turned 3 was really hard for me. It is still hard when she crosses another milestone or bridge of life and I realize that we are DONE with that stage. Toddlerhood? Done. Learning to read? Done. Being allowed to go to the park with a friend or play outside for hours without my eyes upon her to keep her safe? Done, done, done. It's still difficult. SO difficult. I can't imagine it will ever be easy for me to realize that I am no longer the mom of little ones. Even though I identify as such in my heart, other new moms don't recognize it within me.

You said it perfectly. And Catherine, you took the thoughts from my head. I have an 8 year old and a 5 year old. We are done having kids, but I've second guessed that choice many, many times while clinging to the memories of my boys being smaller.

Yes, they still do need you! Choosing cute baby and toddler outfits is a mom's special knack! Comfy clothes they can enjoy and sleep in are the best.

Yes. And then they go and graduate from high school and college. They just keep on moving up and away. These days, I look at little babies with a different set of eyes, knowing that before too long there will be grand babies to rock and cuddle. And those long lost feelings will come flooding back.

It is gone, that time. But good stuff replaces it. My almost teen son is capable of having a conversation that doesn't involve Power Rangers or Ninjago. My nine year old always looks over at me in the stands after he makes a play in baseball or soccer. Sometimes I miss those baby days, but most of the time I like where we are right now.

Couldn't have said it any better. I've struggled with this too and felt that I needed to have another baby because I don't know how to "deal" with the transition. There is a mourning that I think happens when you realize you or in my case...me....will not have another baby or experience those moments again. They are all memories. It's tough to grasp. It's also tough to figure out how to be OK with it. Thank you. You hit it spot on.

I distinctly remember the last time I held a sick, sleepy child...pacing the floor and rocking him in my arms. I remember thinking that I'd BETTER remember it, because it wouldn't happen again. He's 15 now and a foot taller than me. I know what you're feeling. It's bittersweet.

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