Kids talk the darndest ways

I remember the first time my son said "orange," his longstanding favorite color. It wasn't really anything special, until my husband pointed out that it wasn't "aujun," the way he'd said it since he could talk.

Unlike Quinlan, who we dutifully corrected like some ridiculous parenting book told us to do so she'd speak properly and not require a private tutor and years of therapy, we just let it go.

We even committed the cardinal sin and called it that ourselves.

Oh shush, you do it too.

One of my own fondest childhood memories is recalling all the crazy shit my brother would call things; I still call helicopters "hoppo poppos," although, unfortunately, he does not.

These days, the funny words are fading fast, with Margot (and soon Bridget) keeping the dream alive, doing things "mybyself" and asking to read "The Turfin Tollboth" at bedtime.

And, like Drew, she begs us for some "beef turkey" after my monthly shopping trips to Trader Joe's.

I still correct Quinlan's "brung," "getted," and "more better," but I can't help but let the kiddisms run their course, as they always seem to do, often unnoticed.

To me they are the last bastion of my babies' childhood, the reminders that my kids are still kids, like LEGO pockmarks on my ass and crushed Cheerios under my feet on the kitchen floor, oddly comforting when I know full well it will be over soon enough. 

So beef turkey it is.

And beef turkey it always shall be.

So, tell me the funny things your kids say or used to say. Then do yourself a favor and go write them down.

Comments

[Geoff @CostumeKingdom]

While kids are growing up, these funny episodes are normal until they come to terms with the proper pronunciation of languages. It is a good laugh, but at the back of our mind, we all know that we did the same in our childhood: we just don't remember it. Children should be allowed to enjoy their childhood with the little things in life that make them happy, like toys, Father Christmas, Halloween, theme parks, Disney cartoons and magic, amongst others. We should not make them grow too soon.

[Mary@The Good Life]

I still call them "mazagines" just to remind my sis how cute she was and how we all memorized every adorable thing she said.

[Megan]

My 7 y.o. still says "mazagine" for magazine. And my 4 y.o. calls her big toe her "thumb toe." :)

[Pinay WAHM Blogger]

For a time, it's fascinating and funny to be hearing these funny words coming from our children but one of my friends advised me that as long as you can, try to correct these mispronunciations to avoid any difficulties when the child grows up and tries to speak clearly for school.

[andifoo]

I just started a blog to keep track of all the things my four year old daughter says. I'm kicking myself for not doing it a long time ago!

Oaf = Earth
Satauran = Saturn
Bowling Wowie = Bowling Alley
Bagina = Well, you get the idea.

I get so mad at the hubs when he corrects her. She's only this little once and I'm pretty sure she won't head off to college referring to her girlie bits as 'bagina'. But... so what if she does? ;)

[Valerie]

My now 9 year old referred to birthday cakes as "Happy Birthday Cakes" as in "Mommy, will you make me a Happy Birthday Cake?".

[Mandi]

My lil sis used to say "yips it" when she need help with zippers and our Uncle Darryl was Unkie Day-o. I used to call my forehead a headbow. Thirty plus years later these are still used by everyone in the family. Years back a cousin said her sister was being "too saucy" instead of sassy. My kids think saucy is the correct term. My nephew called his sister "LaLa" which is still her fav nickname and his shoes "digglie-digglies." WHERE DID THAT COME FROM!!??:)
My now 14 year old baby said "key more" anytime she wanted a refill of something. I think she combined english and spanish on that one with quiere...?
My middle said/screamed chalkly to signal that she needed more chocolate milk...she was chemically dependent on the stuff for awhile- a fact I'm not proud of, but can defend. She was born a demanding diva, and had middle child syndrome before she was a middie. We catered to her every whim to maintain peace. The last baby says her last name is Grow instead of Crow "because she is growing". She was explaining to me recently that she couldn't get into our other bathroom because daddy shut the door so no one see his pirate....instead of privates. That statement took home the award as "The Absolute Funniest Any Kid EVER has Said to me-EVER." All 3 of my kids wore babe-in suits to the pool, ate marshpellows, prefer Pipsi over Coca-cola, and think Papa's mushnash is pretty scratchy. To uphold a long standing family tradition I vow that I will never say bathing suit, marshmallow, Pepsi, or mustache ever again.

[Emma]

My nearly 2.5 year old gets his word order mixed up sometimes... he calls for the neighbor's cat "where you are Melvin?" instead of where are you. Makes me smile every time. He also says hont instead of honk... I don't know why, but it just sounds so adorable!

[lefty]

I WANNA GO TO BOOGER KING!

Yum yum

[Erica]

I still remember the moment my 2-year-old said "tractor" properly. Made me want to cry. He reverted back to "tack-a-tuck" for a bit but it's totally gone now. We still have "muggins" (music) and "I-gins" (ice cream) and a couple others.

What I'm just learning to enjoy now are the grammatical mix-ups. His pronouns are all screwed at the moment. When he wants something it's all, "you want some choc-lett?" or "you want some soup?" And it's also now, "you made a poopy." Apparently we need to use the first person more around here.

[vicky]

Hot Cho-Cho = Hot chocolate
Granka= Grampa
Leggsy- Lexie, our dog
Vetrickable Me= Despicable Me, the movie

I still call it Hot Cho Cho and Vetrickable Me.

[Yasmin @ alittlelessfluff]

Powder = sprinkles
The movie Lilo and Stich = bunky (i dont even have a clue as to why)
My daughter for some reason says the word b instead of v in certain words. E.G. love = lub, lovely = lubely, movie = moobie, tv = tb. I have kind of left it for now to see where it goes before I go on a correcting spree.

[Jayme]

My son is now 6 but when he was around 2ish he couldn't say my brother-in-law's name, which is Josh. He used to call him "Hoss". His girlfriend at the time was named Cassie and bless my beautiful baby boy cause he couldn't say her name either and called her "ass"!

[Kristy]

Words from my two little ones:

Lap Stick = Chapstick
Cha-Lock-It = Chocolate
Fridger-raid = Refridgerator
Sup-Up = Ketchup
Chim-dee = Chimney
Riddy-Hotta = Harry Potter

My 3 year old still uses Lap Stick & gets her capri sun from the fridgeraid...all the others have faded away :(

[Lindsay]

Hearing my son saying lasterday, instead of yesterday... always makes me smile!! :)

[Melanie]

Bahdadoodoo used to drive me nuts. It was my son's word for ... everything. And nothing. I'm sure it started off as "broadway," the main street our bus route went down. I think. Or it might've been a kiddie version of, "Thingamajig." But soon he used it as "that thing over there," "That thing that's scary," "My favourite thing," and, "I don't want to talk about it."

Other fun ones? Go-gurt, instead of yogurt. Took years before he'd say it right. Refridgerator was fridgamatator.

But my favourite is when he sings O Canada (we live in Canada, and thanks to the 2010 Olympics that were held locally he's the most patriotic kid I've ever known). Instead of "True patriot love," he sings about, "True pastry love!" A kid after my own heart. Mmm. Paaaastry.

[Mindy]

When my son (at age 3-4) was talking about something that happened at the end of a book, he would say, "and on the be-end." I guess because I would always say "the end" when we were done reading. I wish I had recorded him reciting the words to "How Does a Dinosaur Say Goodnight" with me. He is now a preteen, so I would love to listen to that after a night of eye rolling and back talk. :)

[Olivia]

My almost three year old says, "mah-rote" for remote and "music-kick" for music. Other favorite kiddisms are "What it tells?" (What does it say?); and "Listen with your eyes up" (Listen with your eyes open.)

[Katie R-G]

My 8 year used to call oatmeal "oppeemeal" and horseback riding "backhorse riding". Thanks for posting this, it let me remember something that I had too easily forgotten!

[Melissa]

I don't have any kids, but my nieces sometimes come up with the most amazing substitutions for words. One calls me "Auntie LaMissa," instead of Melissa and wants to put on her spacesuit instead of swim/bathing suit. My other niece calls me "My BooBoo" and always wants some lipsgloss if I am putting on chapstick.

[Jennifer]

20 years ago when my sister was a baby she would "toot" and say "nu me" instead of excuse me.

My husband was my boyfriend at the time and we were in high school and we started saying it as a joke whenever bodily functions were happening. ;)

So to this day..we both still say it...along with our 3 boys. ;)

[selena]

Oh, She also calls chapstick "chopsticks" and enjoys America's Homiest Funniest Videos (also known as "People getting hurt"). When she was little, she had trouble with L's and used to ask if she could ride in her Stroger (stroller). I was really sad when she stopped saying that one.

[selena]

My daughter calls my bras my boobies, as in "Oooooh! I love your purple boobies!"

And when I have my period, and and use a pad, she will ask if I am wearing my "mommy diaper".

[Lee]

<3 This!!
When I was a kid I couldn't say my given name (Lisa) so I called myself Reesie. Now that is my license plate.
When the kids were little, etmo = oatmeal.
Jungle = Uncle Jim
Za Za =Trisha
My son still refers to my husband as his "farter" (a fact I will NEVER have to correct). I am my son's Mudder.
My favorite: My daughter took gymnastics. Her then 2 year old brother referred to this as juice snack witz later shortened to snackwitz.

[QandleQueen]

Geeky was cookie
BobBob was Grandpa Bob (and he LOVED the new name)

Amanda called herself "Mana"
1st son changed "Mana" to "Nana"
2nd son changed "Nana" to "Nina". At 24 she still answers to Nina, confounding everyone around her.

[Lydia]

ooh I forgot - the 2 year old truncates words too

so it's 'are you going to hoov the floor?' for example

and the 4 year old says 'howl' instead of 'how' which makes me giggle.

I wasn't giggling this morning though, when the 2 year old announced that I 'stink' - apparently of poo - and when I went to the big sister for backup, was reassuringly told 'only a little bit mummy'. Er, that wasn't the answer I needed!

[Mackenzie's Momma]

At our house "Paper towels" have become "Paper cows" (and EVERYONE calls them that as in "Hey when you come over here can you bring me a paper cow please?")

[Sara]

We have a local car wash place called "octopus car was.". We pass by it on our way to preschool, and every time, my 3.5 year old points and gleefully exclaims "That must be the applepus house!". I don't have it in me to correct him because applepus = octopus is just too cute!

[Dawn]

My favorites are nedder mind = never mind and low din = lie down.

[Nicole]

Tackis = taxis, plutter please = pretty please, take me a bath = give me a bath ... wish I could think of more. Love this!

[ptooie]

Apparently when I was a wee one, I said "mishmellows" for marshmallows. My mom always thought it was cute, and because she watches my kids 4 days a week, they thought the actual word was mishmellows (until their daddy spoiled the fun by asking what the heck they were talking about).

[Ivy]

My 2-year old wanted to taste my "cappanino" (cappucino) this morning - and I let him stick his fingers in my mug and proclaim "this is very good!" He says dinosiraptor = dinosaur or velociraptor. The colors of my clothes are actually my colors, as in "mommy's sooo green" when I wear a green shirt. My breasts are called "milka-milka-milks" and he'll say "mommy has blue milka-milka-milks" if I wear a blue bra.

[My Kids Mom]

Happy Burpday!

He is past it now, at ten but when he was two my sister told me to enjoy it, a year later it would be gone. It lasted seven years.

[Not Supermom]

Once upon a time, my son used the noun as a verb when speaking. For example, he would suggest we "broom the floor." One day, my husband and I had gone into our front closet to do some work (we were hanging shelves) and my husband walked by with a drill. My son saw, and shouted "Don't forget to close the door before you screw!" He didn't like the noise of the drill. I pulled something laughing.

[Lynnette]

My now 6.5 year old used to call goose bumps "goose bubbles". My 20 month old says "Tate-oo Mama" to anyone that she wants to thank.

[Jenn]

ok, this is making me kind of teary!

When my daughter was younger, she used to say "ch-chies" for French fries, and "pie-lala" for pineapple. Then one day I said it back to her and she looked at me and said, "no, mommy. it's PINEAPPLE." my heart might have cracked.

Now it's more vocab. She asked for "snow headphones" one day (earmuffs) and wanted a "hot milk cup" with her name on it (mug). I refuse to correct her.

[Kari]

When my daughter was younger & wanted water, she would ask for "thirsty with a lid"-I always gave her water in a sippy cup. I was kind of sad when I took away those cups, thinking I wouldn't hear that anymore, but she continued to ask for water that way for a long time after!

[Carolynne]

My daughter called toilet paper "paper toilet" until she was about preschool age. I hated to correct it because it was so cute. My younger sister always wanted me to "barsh" (brush) her hair. Somehow my son came up with "ba ha kway pa" which was what he called spongebob squarepants for a long time. He even sang it along to the tune of the music!

[Margot]

My three year old wakes up each morning, takes off her pullup and goes 'companda' until it is time to get dressed for the day.

[Melissa]

My oldest had some trouble transitioning to the "big sister" role, and when her little sister was only a few days old could be heard screaming at her to "BE LAX!" hands on hips and all.

All winter she was singing the "Hippopammanouses" song, and I am kicking myself for teaching her how to say Hippopotamus. Though she still adds some adorable extra syllables to Rhinosorouses in the same song.

[Mandy]

My all time favorite is when my son, who loves trucks, shouts out "Ambiance!" whenever he sees an ambulance.

[Kristen Chase - Motherhood Uncensored]

ALOTAPUS. Awesome.
I'm laughing and silently weeping at these.

[Caroline]

I was a little bit heartbroken when my daughter self-corrected "keep-safin'" (as in, "I'm gonna put my book on the counter for keep-safin', Mama") to "safe-keeping."

Although I was happy when she learned how to correctly pronounce "flag" because her emphatic "MAMA MAMA LOOK IT'S A BIG FAG!" often drew stares in the grocery store parking lot...

[danielle]

My daughter asked for a "hypo-ajajenic" dog (because her brother is allergic to cats/dogs). I told her no, we were getting a baby instead, but I still refer to yorkies, poodles and the like as 'hypo-ajajanic' dogs :)

[Jennifer]

We call blowing your food to cool it off "foofing". Our son came up with this when he was two because of the sound you make when blowing on hot food. He's six now and we still call remind each other to foof our food when it's hot.

[Amanda]

Fin asks me to paint her "footnails" and Avery tells me that her hair is "pastaticky." Finley also loves my bras, particularly a pink one. She'll say, "Mom, which nipples are you wearing?" I know Briar still has something she says, but it escapes me now, which kind of makes me weepy.

Sigh.

[Leslie]

We still say "plause" for pause. My oldest started it and the younger one continued it because we never corrected either of them since it was so cute. Now, even Husband and I ask each other to "plause" the TV all the time.

[Andrea]

Three year old daughter used to say alotapus = platypus. Which we would bust out laughing every time,it passed quickly but it still makes us laugh to think about it.

[Lydia]

we have 'smooze me' instead of 'excuse me' which we've adopted, 'set up' instead of 'upset' from the 4 year old (yet the 2 year old says 'upset' perfectly!)

and the 2 year old mixes things up too, saying she wants me to sit on her lap or she wants to pick me up for example! And 'you love me, mummy?' always as a question, never a statement. lots of things like 'my do it myself' too.

[LIttle D]

My daughter also called her bathing suit her "baby suit". She also likes when I put on "lick stick" because is makes me look "cute-iful". My son has a hard time saying my daughter's name, so he just calls her "SISSA!"

[B]

I love the nicknames they come up with for each other. My daughter called our son "Bunny" for a long time but meant "Buddy". I was sad the first day she said it correctly. Hell, I'm still bummed.

[Rachel]

My 3-year-old has had some good ones, but they are fading from my memory so fast! Now she says "skissors" for scissors and "Lubby" for "Wubbzy", as in Wow Wow Wubbzy.

[Karen]

Hanitizer = hand sanitizer

There's more, but that's the one we all use now.

[Cheryl]

To my daughter, "inside out" was "unfleeced." To my son, the "air conditioner" was "ketter." But my all-time favorite is "syna-God" instead of "synagogue," since we're Jewish. That is one I'm never going to correct.

[Goddess in Progress]

Oh, I just love these. At almost 4.5, my big kids are dropping the funny-isms pretty quickly. I was so sad when they started properly pronouncing backpack ("pack-pack") and umbrella ("bring-gwell-la"). Though my daughter still says "breck-dis" for breakfast, and my son INSISTS that the singular of "wax" is "wack." As in, "there's a drop of wack from that candle."

[anne]

My daughter used to call limosines "magazines".

[Julie Marsh]

Fridgalator is my most enduring example. Everybody says fridgalator now, courtesy of CJ.

Also, waterlemon (Oliver).

[Kristen Chase - Motherhood Uncensored]

Okay, I'm dying here. Heptadoctor. Everyguys. Tamornin.

I'm dead. Of the cuteness.

[Amelia Sprout]

M calls vampires vampirates. I can't bear to correct her. She had problems with the th sound, which we did correct her on and work with her on. She also says hims instead of his.

[Casey]

My little niece, at age one, used to say "everyguys" instead of everybody, as in "Watch me, everyguys!" Her brother, my nephew, used to say, "own own" instead of "very own" as in "I have my own own burrito!"

Our favorite one was, after the family cat passed away, was, "Kitty dived." Now, when we're talking about "did you hear so-and-so died" we correct it: "You mean they dived?" Nice call on the rest of the family carrying on the tradition long after the kid stops.

[Trish]

Lellow is my all time favorite from my oldest daughter. My son tells me he's bupposed to do something. My niece ALWAYS calls the movie "Horton Whores a Who". I do not have it in me to correct her and god if that's not the best porn movie name ever, I don't know what is. So far, the 2yo hasn't come up with anything. She will in her own time and I can't wait!

[Katie McChord]

My now 7 year old used to say "Night, night. See you tamornin'" when she was little. Everyone in the family, except her, still says it.

[Liz]

My son's best kiddisms aare "heptadoctor" for "helicopter," and "baby soup" for "bathing suit." I love them. I never want anyone to correct him, ever!

[Kristen Chase - Motherhood Uncensored]

KB - A little neighbor girl says "lasterday" and I LOVE IT.

[Cara]

My now 14 year old used to call Eeore (the donkey) Or Eh and horses were HeyKay's. I too remember the the moment when I realized she wasnt saying them that way anymore and feeling bad that I hadnt noticed exactly when. It is hard to remember what the next 3 children said that were cute. Although number 3 (age 7) just told us that her New Year's "Revolution" was to eat more than she usually does. Definitely should have been writing them down.

[linsey taylor]

My daughter used to say "Run FROM you life". :) I still say it but she does not.

[Shannon]

When my daughter was a toddler she called her bathing suit her "baby suit". Couldn't you just die? It was so cute I absolutely refused to correct her. She grew out of it after a few months, but it is for sure the cutest thing she ever said. :) She also used to mix up the "c" and the "f" sound in "careful" (which I said to her a lot at that age particularly) and when she said it, it somehow came out sounding very much like "f*ck you". That was a fun party trick. :)

[Melissa]

Waverly was "meemo" the orange fish for Halloween. When she went "treat tricky" she got lots of "cha-LAWK-it."

She likes eating Cahhhh-do(avocado) and matoes for lunch.

She calls the game hide and seek "where is she?" in the same tone and inflection I use when I'm seeking. She will stand by the table, pull the tablecloth over her face only, and call, "Mama, where is she?"

She mixes up her pronouns which is hysterical. She climbs in my lap and says I read this to you when she wants me to read to her.
I love 23 months old so, so much.

[Angie]

After the earthquake, which us Virginians never expeirence, my 4 yo daughter told everyone she knows what happens during the "earth shake". Which is always, ALWAYS accompanied by her shaking her booty.

[KB]

My Jack would say "lasterday" instead of yesterday, but everybody totally knew what he meant. And my Mo still says "naybe" instead of maybe, even though she claims to know better. During the Pina Colada Song, they both song "If you like cheese enchiladas . . ." Perfect!

[Linda]

My sister is still mad at me for correcting my daughter's "brock-o-wee" (instead of broccoli). Like you, I've stopped correcting the cute things, and now only correct some of the past tense grammar mistakes ("Her" went to the store. I "eat-ed" that.) They grow up too fast...I feel like I need to enjoy the cute stuff!

[Katie R-G]

Well, you may still have a bit longer to relish in the "kiddisms". Last night after her 1 hour ballet followed by 1 hour hip/hop classes, my 8 year old announced that "Miss Kelley really busted my balls".

She meant "busted my hump", and after laughing hysterically for 10 minutes at her goof, I had to clearly point out the difference between a ball busting and a tough workout. Now to find out which of the assholes in my house is going around saying "busting my balls"! I suspect the husband.

The toddlerism that I still hold onto from said 8 year old is "Lellow". Her favorite color, and my favorite word ever.

[Liza]

My favorite is from when my son was a toddler. Instead of saying "excuse me" he would say "me-me." I adopted it instantly, and now he and his sister both correct me.

When he was just a little older, he started playing with toy "ptu-ers," which he learned from the older boys to whom these toys belonged, are actually called "guns" or "laser guns."

Josie is pokey about getting dressed, which in the winter means plenty of opportunity for her to show me her "goof bumps."