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August 24, 2010


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I like the idea of good or bad choice. I have called my daughter bad girl a couple of times and knew it was a terrible likely scarring thing to say. Bad choice it is.

Yep. I hate the good/bad labels applying to the actual children, as well. And one could take it even a step further and say there are no good or bad choices, only choices that lead to desireable or undesirable consequences. I think the lesson that every action results in a consequence (good/bad, desireable/or not) is most important.

I love this one! I agree whole-heartedly. I tell my kids that they made a bad choice or are behaving badly. I also tell my 2 year old that she's not being a good listener, but I always try to let them know that they are good kids and that they can make better choices next time.

I agree. We have always tried in our home to put the emphasis on "right choice" or "wrong choice" not "good or bad boy." We do the same with accomplishments ("good job!") because their "goodness" is not determined by how well they can throw a ball or write their letters either.
Great post!

I couldn't agree with this more!! In fact, I just had this discussion with my boys the other day. They had done some not-so-good things, and were on restriction (i.e. computer privileges taken away). We were getting ready to go to the pool and my 6 yr old said "But why would you want to take us to the pool if we are bad?" I cringed at hearing that last phrase, and immediately clarified that they were GOOD - in fact, awesome! - boys...it's just that they did something bad (but now reading this, I like using the word "wrong" or "not right"). As I made sure they understood how GOOD they were as human beings, it was reminded that YES, the very boys who had been fighting non-stop the entire day were definitely very GOOD and AWESOME kids...and it helped shift my focus to the positive!! Thanks for this great reminder. :-)

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