Be a Better Parent Challenge - Day 13 - The dreaded "in a minute"

I'm miserably sick with one of the worst colds I've had in a long time, and after taking kid's allergy medicine (holy crap, yo), I don't even really remember what happened after dinner time. Seriously, I think I fell asleep in four different places around my house until I finally scrambled into bed at midnight, only to be awoken every two hours by my toddler.

However, I did my best to play what they wanted to play, which just so happened to be the card game War. And then Monopoly.

Probably I good thing I was hopped up on medication, huh?

I'm not letting up today, even though my husband got called on a trip and I can't breathe through my nose. We'll be tackling my nemesis with much gusto.

Challenge #13: The Dreaded "in a minute"

I know we've all got some form of this - either it's "in a second" or "give me a minute" or some variation of the above, but it's an amorphous putter-offer (how do you like that?) that gets to be as annoying as hell. Not just for the kids, but for me too.

I use it most when I'm in the middle of working and the kids need me for something. And so, while I can't exactly get up to meet their needs at the moment that they need them (unless there's blood, poop, or vomit - I tell them), I need to use better parameters.

• In five minutes (and set the timer)

• When the show is over

• When I'm off the phone

This is a challenging one, but it's made much easier when you give your kids an actual MEASURABLE TIME. And then, the hard part, sticking to it.

Good luck today. I know I'm going to need it. 

Comments

[Kristy]

Yes, I should work on that. I hope you feel better!

[Asianmommy]

Whenever I said, "Just a second," my kids always said, "One!" So now, I've learned to say "Give me five minutes." Works much better! :)

[Melanie]

I'm with you here, too. My son (4 1/2) has zero concept of exactly how long a minute is as a direct result of my in-a-minute-ing. None. It's an indefinite length of time.

So I've been trying lately to give him something more concrete to work with. "When I'm done this email," "when I'm done talking with Granna," "when I'm done unloading the dishwasher," "when I'm done making the salad."

Trouble is he holds me to it. "Maaammmmaaaaa! You said when you were done unloading the dishwasher, and you're loading it up now. When are you gonna do it???"

[Theresa]

Aaaahhhhh..my ultimate problem. I am the queen of in a minute!!

[Suzie]

Ha! This is what I named my blog. Found it to be a fitting phrase, since now that my girls are 12 and 14, they give me the "in a minute" as much as I give (gave?) it to them. Time for dinner! "in a minute" Clean your room! "in a minute ..."

I find the timer to be one of the absolute essential items in parenting. We still use various forms of timers. (My 14yo sets her cell phone timer to keep track of her computer-time limits, for example.)

[fibithinks]

This is going to be a difficult one for me too. I use "just a second" a lot. Especially when My 3.5 year old wants something and I am mid-sentence in an email responding to a customer. I do always try to get right up after I am finished in hopes that she realizes that I am not just saying it to get out of doing something and that I really will tend to her needs in just a second. I will try to be more specific and not give the blanket "just a second" response.

[Linda Kerr]

Good luck! I have that same cold (guessing I got it at BlogHer) and my husband leaves for 2 weeks this weekend. Must beat the cold before he goes. Work is keeping me busy. I'm rooting for you and looking for advice, too.