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May 27, 2010

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I hardly leave a response, but i did a few searching and wound up here Motherhood Uncensored: The big pregnant girl. And I actually do have a couple of questions for you if you usually do not mind. Could it be only me or does it look like a few of the responses appear like they are written by brain dead people? :-P And, if you are writing at other places, I'd like to keep up with everything fresh you have to post. Would you make a list of all of all your communal pages like your Facebook page, twitter feed, or linkedin profile?

That's the kind of image that i really thing is super image like. If more images very real like this were out there we'd be super full of graet images in the world.

These can be seen through various tests, such as the light arm experiment. He finds out that she is going to be transferred to a hospital, where the doctor performs bizarre experiments on patients, that usually result in death. You may want to read our article Yitzhaq Hayutman's revelation of the occult holographic third temple wherein we note that'by the way, this is in actual real life'cybernetics expert Yitzhaq Hayutman wants to bring peace to the Middle East by, in essence, shaping events which will cause a messiah (that's right, not the Messiah but a, as it any) to be revealed.

Wow, that kind of attitude is very admirable. The health of the baby in the womb is always a top priority, so it's only right that you match your routine with what's best for it. Anyway, no matter how much you weigh after giving birth, it's a better accomplishment if you're able to revert to your old weight. :)

i got pregnant with my first one when i was a month away from 18 and still cannot get down to my pre pregnancy weight i was 261 before i got pregnant and at the end i weigh a whopping 360 i gained 99 pound with him and he just turned 2 this month not even a week ago me and my husband are trying for another one but i cannot seem to get another one in me because i have not had a period since april 4 and it is september 24 right now and i dont know what is wrong with me i mean i stopped birth control in november of last year which and i had two periods after that and i need to know what i should do.

Oh i hear ya babe. I had FINALLY got back down to my petite size 4 pre-pregnancy size, 2 years after having my first and I was absolutely DELIGHTED.

Then I found out that Yaz doesn't work and I was expecting baby number 2 in August.

I've already gained over 30 pounds and I'm not even in the third trimester yet. It is SO DEPRESSING. I really feel like it makes being pregnant, suck that much more. I don't even fit into my MATERNITY clothes anymore. It's maxi dresses all the way at this point. I feel like a HOUSE.

So I hear ya...

And seriously, a 4th kid? Have you considered condoms? lol

Not that I'm one to talk... I was on Yaz birth control pills and I still got pregnant. Some people are just super fertile I guess.

Love you babe and sending you a BIG HUG!

Wow, Anissa - YOU ARE my doppelganger! And yes Elizabeth, I'm definitely fortunate to have the "extra room" (as my first OB told me) being almost 6 feet tall. I can only imagine how uncomfy it is packing all that in a 5'2" frame. (Though you looked hot when I saw you!)

I totally hear you and if I got pregnant again (God forbid as my husband took the plunge because we are DONE), I'd be feeling the same way. My pattern was gain 80, lose 50, gain another 60, lose 40... you get the picture. I FINALLY got the majority of the weight back off and it would be so hard to gain it again. But I would if I did, which I won't. But I understand.

Well congrats on your fourth! quite amazing! Will that be four under the age of 7? I have always been deceptively heavy. i don't know if I have denser bones or what but my size 6 (and the OLD size 6) body weighs 150 pounds. I put on at least 55 pounds for each of my pregnancies and saw the scale tip over 200. A frightening sight. But my second baby was an angel sent from heaven so my theory is that if I have another one I am going to do exactly what I did while I was pregnant with him (DO NOT exercise, eat whatever I want, whenever I want including at least 3 MacDonalds #6 meals with (small) vanilla shake every week). For my first pregnancy I worked out 3 times a week and did not put on as much weight and baby was still a gift from heaven (but not as good a sleeper). Even if my theory holds no water at least I'll get to drink lots of milkshakes. And then I'll just have to visit my friends at Jenny Craig afterwards (they were extremely helpful when the weight did not magically melt away after my second).

I've been reading here for almost a couple years, and don't think I've posted before, but have to today, because this pretty much confirms that you are my virtual (non-evil) doppelganger (or just really good at writing about the stuff nobody else will say but we all know ...) I started reading shortly after the end of my temporary sojourn in Mississippi, where I worked in Columbus and attended the W, and was sorely dissapointed to discover your archives and know that we never connected during our overlapping times of disconnected amazement at the wonder that is the great state of Mississippi. We're the same age, and I'm also right around six feet tall, which lends itself to some of my issues with the topic of day.

My third child is now three months, and with all three kids I gained over 60 pounds. This last time, I too was really trying not to feel like a beached whale for 9+ months (and then postpartum..) and determined I was going to be the cute little bump gal, but yeah, it's not in me. Every part of me is pregnant, and looks it, and I reluctantly had to accept that (again). The rational me knows the important thing is that I have beautiful healthy babies, and I actually lose most of the weight pretty quickly (although less quickly each time), but it didn't make me feel less huge and in some ways self conscious through the pregnancy.

You are seriously inspiring in the way you share all aspects of your struggles and many successes, good and bad, in parenting and life in general, and I offer my congratulations and good wishes on your new little one to come, and lots of positive thoughts for you and her both as you go through this pregnancy as best you can. I'm glad you're willing to share a broader realm of your experience, because it does help the rest of us.

Thank you for this. I'm already a big girl and pregnant with my first. I'm trying to focus on enjoying this and not worry about the clothes that won't fit, or loosing the weight etc. Certainly I don't want to be unhealthy, and I don't want to set myself up for failure, but that includes setting myself up for other types of failure too. I am what I am, and I'll make the best of that.

I had similar issues with my second pregnancy - horrified by how long it took to lose the weight I gained in my first pregnancy (2 years) and determined to do better this time. My body had different ideas: even taking care of what I ate, I gained the same amount, in the same places, and it took just as long for it to go away. And I was mightily offended when someone recently told me I'd "done really well in keeping off the weight", like somehow it was my fault I put on weight in the first place.

I think it's great you are writing about this, as I think we all - girls and boys, mothers and non-mothers - need to realise that body weight is just not something we can control when it comes to pregnancy, and - to a point, of course - neither should we.

i'm grateful for your honesty.
right there with you...nearly 10 weeks along with number 3. i thinked i dm-ed you a bit ago, this is a 30 day shred meets mominatrix baby :)
first tri has me too nauseous to work out, and has driven me toward simple white carbs.
it's hard not to be a bit bummed when catch sight of jiggly arms in a mirror, or feel like my legs look like tree trunks all of a sudden. i miss the good runner's highs i'd achieved last summer and fall, into winter.
second tri and renewed energy are around the corner - hopefully...
looking forward to some prego shredhead talk. even moreso to postbaby shredding challenges.
and above all, so happy to have found this blog through all of that shredhead talk.
for countless reasons - momstuff, often-single-mom stuff, nursing and elimination diet writings, work@home musings/rants -- all of it. i'm grateful.
congrats. and again, as always, thank you for your honesty. we'll shred [and nurse!] it off in no time :)

Oh, this is a brave post, kid.

I'm [not] trying like hell to get this weight off. Still wearing maternity pants EIGHT MONTHS LATER. I don't know when I'm going to hit rock bottom. Seeing as I just finished a jar of Nutella that I just bought, like, three days ago, I'm guessing maybe around the time your girl is hatched.

Then I'll join the {almost}shredheads and we'll lose it all together.

You're doing great. Really great.

Take it easy. You look great. I gained 50+ with each my kids. I understand the weight obsession but try to take it easy.

Give yourself a break lady. Seriously, you have 3 children already that you parent solo a majority of the time, several blogs to you credit, a successful book, AND YOU ARE PREGNANT. Everything in moderation, that even means eating (possibly indulging), and exercise as long as you are comfortable and can do so without straining yourself. But most of all, give yourself a break. And I mean it. I know we can all say, Yeah BUT this this and this. No buts. Throw some DOra up in that DVD player, slice some apples and put some PB out, sit the kids down, (when the littlest is sleeping) and then sit your ass down and relax.
I did the exact opposite and ended up i n pre term labor and then on bedrest for the duration. I had him early too. Listen to your body and take it back a notch.

I haven't posted a comment in awhile, but i want to remind you that you're building a house with your body. A house that is going to protect, feed, and nurture your little girl. You want that house to be strong. Yes it may take a while for house to come down, but then again it took 9 months to put up. And it was a damn strong house.

This so resonates with me. I've lost weight in the last year, and even though it's not as much as I would like, it's good and I have WAY better exercise habits now than I have in a long, long time.

So, as I consider a third kid/second pregnancy, the idea of not gaining another 65 pounds is at the front of my mind. Especially as I would be starting out way heavier than ideal, to begin with.

I was never going to be the girl who carried a pregnancy like a cute little basketball under her shirt (even if the first pregnancy hadn't been twins). I'm going to get huge, no two ways about it. But I really do want to keep up with at least some level/frequency of exercise, since I was all but sedentary during my last pregnancy. Even if the number on the scale isn't any better, I would hope that keeping the habit to whatever level I am able would not only help with some of the aches and pains, but ease the transition back into more serious exercise postpartum.

Obviously, though, you're right. We can't get so obsessed over "sticking with the plan" that we push too hard and put ourselves and the baby at risk. Excellent food for thought. I hope this is the most eventful thing that happens during your entire pregnancy, and that the rest is smooth sailing.

Ditto to ALL OF THAT. I'm killing myself fitting in my workout every day when I'm so exhausted afterward I can barely stand up because DAMMIT I JUST lost the baby weight from #1 and now I'm supposed to gain it all back? My doctor says I can gain the same 35 lbs (uh, more like 45) I did last time but the idea of losing it all again makes me want to give up on healthy food and exercise forever.
My solution has been to throw out the scale and accept all the size large maternity clothes my friends offer. Gihugo here I come.

Good for you for realizing what's going on. I'm pregnant with #3 and weigh now what I did when I gave birth to the first two. (Yeah, emotionally, that's rough.) So the moment I peed on a stick I determined that I would only gain 15 pounds! Maybe 20! No more! Ha. I've had an enormous appetite, no energy at all for exercise, and crazy nausea that is at it's very worst when I'm hungry. So I've been eating. Today the nurse said, "Isn't that cute. You're 12.4 weeks and you've gained 12.4 pounds!" Yeah, adorable. I don't look pregnant at all. I just look fat. But I'm going to have to be okay with that, because I've got to grow a baby.

Girlfriend, if I can be so bold, get a grip. Do what is safe and right for your baby and yourself! You're smart enough to know what that is.

Cut yourself the slack that you would cut somebody else in your shoes.

You know what you will have to do to get back in tip top shape. Hello... running... Jillian.... etc.

It's going to be ok. : )

This really hit me hard, because I am overweight to begin with, and I am petrified of how much weight I may gain in this (my first) pregnancy. Thank you for reminding me that it will be okay if I just take it easy and don't panic or obsess about things.

This was me back in January. I signed up for races to run and everything thinking I would be this svelte pregnant woman. I had just lost all the baby #2 weight after all. I didn't want to give up on running either. After throwing up every day I worked out though I had to listen to my body. It's been frustrating to not work out but each time I do this pregnancy I am a diaster the rest of the day and the next. My body just can't take it so I need to accept my thighs going soft again, my ass getting bigger and so forth.

Hang in there. I'm right there with you.

You're a beautiful pregnant woman! You take good care of yourself...your body will do what it needs to do.

Soooo true how every woman puts on the weight differently. Even though I'm 5'4, when pregnant, I don't get a huge belly; my weight gain tends to be everywhere else. With my first son, I gained 40lbs all in my thighs, chest, arms and face, and never lost any of it. This second pregnancy, I only put on 20lbs (don't be all envious; I was 50lbs overweight to begin with), and many of my co-workers didn't even know I was pregnant until after I delivered. I actually lost all this weight within 2 weeks, but am still working my way back into my clothes 4mos later.

I can't believe your OB office blew you off like that! NOT acceptable from a health care professional.

I have two friends who are pregnant at the same time as me (we're all two weeks apart) and it is SO HARD not to compare, even though we started from very different places. And then the more I think about it the more I start worrying about what it'll be like post baby. Which is so not the point. The point is being healthy all the way along and giving birth to a healthy baby.

I somehow totally missed altogether that you were pregnant - what the hell? Congratulations, Kristen! You do always look really, ridiculously beautiful, size 8 or 10 or whatever.

Wise words. Pregnancy definitely does different things to different people (my butt got giant but then deflated the instant I had the baby), and to try to fight what our bodies want to do during this, uh, "delicate" time is only going to be crazymaking.

Oh, sweetie. You're always hot -- even if you get gihugo. I envy your body confidence every single day. Seriously.

I'm one of those annoying women who didn't gain much weight with pregnancy. After Katie's birth, though, I gained a significant amount of weight due to all the fluids they were pushing to try to keep me alive. I was horrified when I couldn't fit into my maternity pants to go home. Poor P had to help me squeeze into them until I could get home and switch to the most huge PJs I owned. And I came home to my stick thin sister. That? Was depressing.

I know you know what to do and I eagerly await seeing the newest little uncensored darling.

Um, remember when we met in Chicago and you had to do the "tall girl squat" because I'm a foot shorter than you are. If you ever feel really huge, remember that I'm gaining the same amount of weight you are, but that I have significantly less space for that weight to go. I gained 50+ pounds with my first baby and you could probably roll me around like that big blueberry chick from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

And now that you just pictured that in your head, go ahead and laugh :-)

One thing I like about you is that you own your choices and if they need to be changed you change them. That is an awesome quality to have! I do have to say though that one thing sticking in my head about this post is the on call OB. Rude, inconsiderate, the list goes on and on...the response you received was so wrong - it's docs like him/her (?) that make women afraid to call and ask questions about their own health - so wrong!!!

Oh, I hope you start feeling a lot better. You are one of the most beautiful people I know.

Steph

Oh, sweetie! I had the opposite problem when I was pregnant both times. I couldn't gain weight, stayed so sick I could barely stand to wake up in the mornings, and had teeny tiny babies who were premature. Please think of the weight as a beautiful thing because trust me when I say that when I see a pregnant woman all I see is beauty, no matter the size of the girl.

You are blessed that you can gain weight to sustain that wonderful little life inside you. Don't worry about taking it back off. I'm sure once you are chasing around 4 little ones, it'll start coming off pretty quickly.

Just remember to be more concerned about taking care of that sweet baby growing in there because that's what is important, not some numbers on a scale.

Oh, you know you're going to be plenty hot when this baby is no longer in your body. You have determination like that. In the meantime, enjoy the big bootie and grow that baby!

I have to laugh at GIHUGO... :)

So what if you aren't a freak like Heidi Klum or those other ridiculously skinny-pregnant models? You're you, and there's nothing wrong with gaining weight during the pregnancy. And when you worry about it, remember at the very least that you know you CAN lose the weight afterward.

Do the best you can to eat healthy during the pregnancy, then afterward you know the Shredheads will be there when you're ready. :)

Wow. This hit home today. Thank you for posting it.

I'm in my second pregnancy and haven't lost the extra weight from my first. One of my OBs in particular is all about me not gaining ANY weight. At my 16 week checkup this week I had gained 4 pounds. On my home scale I had gained 1 pound. I'm exercising and exhausted and out of breath and hungry everyday. I felt so defeated.

Thankfully my husband didn't object to listening to me complain about what they must all think of me at that office and how I was never going to be able to do this. I even went so far as to speculate that there would be no maternity clothes made for people this big. *sigh* After I was all out of rants and tears, he told me that I grew a health happy baby girl 2 years ago and I'll do it again, no matter what the scale says. And I never had to go to work naked last time.

Oh how I can related! I am 38 weeks pregnant with #2 and have had a hard time dealing with my growing girth and the increasing numbers on the scale. So far I believe I have gained 32 pounds, which is not as much as some other women, but is a lot for someone under 5'2" who has always struggled with her weight. Last year I was working out and working hard to be healthy and fit, not concentrating on weight so much, but on how I felt and could perform. I was feeling so strong and confident. I was running several times a week, lifting weights, being an active happy lady. And then I got knocked up, and running made me sick. I had a miscarriage the year before so I was hesitant to go to hard with exercise. I have kept up a decent level of activity, but not as much as I feel I should have. I fantasize about running and being fit and losing this weight. And then I feel guilty for those feelings, because I know that my body needs to gain weight to help nurture my baby. I know that I can work it off soon enough. But its hard to relinquish control. It helps a little that people say I look good, but then I hate them for even bringing up how I look and making me think about it. Ugghh! It sucks.

Good on you, lady.

I'm 8 months along and have already gained 40 pounds - and I gain it everywhere too. I feel huge, think I look huge and would probably only want to gain less just so I fit into the ONE size of maternity clothes (am in between the medium and large so either too small or too big). It is mentally draining to see the numbers on the scale - especially when the doctor's office scale is ALWAYS 2 pounds heavier than the one at home!

I won't even step on the scale but once a week and even then I'm all, "Ooh, I can probably drop a couple of these pounds." I think that mentally the weight gain during pregnancy is really tough, especially when you've worked so hard to lose the weight from before. And even thought we KNOW we HAVE to gain weight, it's still a hill to battle.

But, you know that you can lose the weight with diet and exercise AFTER you have #4. But in the meantime, LISTEN to your body and if it's telling you to slow down then SLOW DOWN.

You have been, and will continue to be, beautiful in your skin no matter how much your body changes during pregnancy. Now don't make me come down there! :) xo

Kristen

wow. Maybe it's just my hormones from recently weaning my daughtr but your post has me in tears.

I had difficult pregnancies and when not on bedrest, I had to "minimize activity". Which meant I got HUGE every time and felt like a sea lion waddling around on land.

I also had plenty of experience with terrfying, searing abdominal pains and dismissive medical personnel.

So, I identify with a lot of what you wrote.

But I also admire your determination to stay fit and healthy. And empathize with your desire to repeat your past experiences.

That all said, I applaud your recognition of your limits and your respect for your pregnant body.

I'll be here cheering you on throughout your pregnancy (I've been a reader of your blog for a year now and I love your writing) and I hope you really can internalize that it's ok to be pregnant and NOT look like a popsicle stick with a cute little ball attached to it.

Post pictures of a pregnant Kate Hudson or Jennifer Lopez around your house-and ban all pics of pregnant Nicole Kidman and Angelina Jolie!!! LOL

Oh this made me sad. I can relate, even though I've only had one baby (you're probably telling me to shut up now), but I gained 65 pounds during my pregnancy because I didn't work out at all and pretty much ate what I wanted (which turned out to be a lot of cheese). I lost all the baby weight after two years (due partly to your inspiration and a relinquishing of the cheese!) and I'm planning to have another baby soon... but I'm stupidly terrified of becoming that huge again. I can definitely see myself doing the same as you described, it's a good wake up call. But also we are constantly bombarded by images of skinny pregnant women and people (other women) saying things like "she has such a cute little bump/she hasn't gained any extra weight/etc!" (seriously, a man would never say these things and I want to SCREAM when women do this--why can't we just freaking grow a person without being subjugated to the judging? As if gaining a few extra pounds during PREGNANCY makes you a failure...). Aargh the stupid pressures of being female. Big pregnant girls are beautiful. Skinny pregnant girls are beautiful. Growing a human is beautiful. That is all (sorry for the rant!).

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