Whoever said the Mommy Wars were dead and buried must have missed the memo, because damn if there's yet another way for moms marginalize each other.
It's a WAHM versus WOHM smackdown.
Apparently working from home is waaaaaaay easier than working at an office because you can do what you want all day long.
And working at an office is sooooo much nicer because there aren't distractions like children and dogs and clinging coffee cups and UPS delivery people who ring your doorbell at naptime even when you have a big sign that says "PLEASE KNOCK" right on the doorbell.
This certainly doesn't mean you can't complain about your particular work situation.
Feel free to bitch about how hard it is to leave your kids all day with a nanny, or au pair, or grandmother, or *GASP* daycare center and then have to come home and find yourself stretched 400 ways.
Gripe about how you're never able to fully focus because you've got one hand on the computer keys and another feeding your baby or a couple of senior citizens with a hearing aid gabbing about their hormone replacement therapy over coffee in your "office."
It's all hard.
It's hard to have to come home after a long day at work and make dinner and play with your kids and do the whole routine all over again.
And it's pretty damn challenging to actually get an entire project completed in the office which is often times your kitchen and figure out how to manage conference calls with your kids grabbing at your ankles.
And even if you're not "working" in or out of the home, you SAHMS. Well, your job is hard too.
Let's all give ourselves a pity party and then get over it.
Haven't we figured out that the grass is always greener?
On some days, I'd love my quiet corner office back with a lock on the door and an administrative assistant to do my photo copies and send my faxes and screen my calls.
But I chose to leave that job and stay home with kids. Then I chose to write a blog, and then start a business and write a book, and do all the other sometimes awesome sometimes tedious work that I do to contribute to my household income so we can live in a house with big closets where my babies can sleep.
I've spent almost five years telling my husband how much harder my job is than his. Until I realized that my job really isn't harder. Being around the kids and trying to get something done is pretty challenging and tiring and exhausting and frustrating.
And what I figured out was that I was just envious. Of the days away. Of the quiet hotel rooms. Of the dinners in Venice hell, even some army base in Kentucky.
So when I finally sucked it up and realized that all this, everything that I had created, was my choice, then I just got the fuck over it already and decided to be thankful for what I have.
Yes, I still bitch and complain and moan. I think that's part of being someone other than Mother Theresa.
Some days I'd die to be the mom up the street who gets to drop her kids off and work out of her office all day long. And I know that she'd probably love to have her kids screaming in the next room while she tried to write an article.
But whatever you do, you're still a mother while you're doing it. And that's nothing to sneeze at.
So why don't we just take a step back and admit that sometimes our jobs suck. And sometimes we're a little jealous of the mom next door.
And then get the fuck over ourselves and spend our energy trying to figure out a way to make our own situation better.
Like my friend said, "This fairly reeks of the Who Has the Biggest Penis Game. Ladies, it's time to put them away."