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June 15, 2009

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I too was a teenage mother, throwing up in the bathroom between classes and going to school 12 hours a day with a newborn just to graduate a year late. I have had two babies with two absent fathers, cried more tears than most babies, and I am constantly searching for the right way to eventually teach my sons how NOT to become their fathers. It is so much harder than any teenager will ever guess, but somehow we survive and are stronger because of it.

I was not ready at 17 to be a father but I did it anyway.I would not have it any other way.I missed out on alot of the things a normal teenage guy goes through but I have never questioned my choice.
Today I am the Grandfather of 5 and I am still young enough to enjoy it (51).
However,we had alot of help and support from family and that really made the difference.We could never have done it alone.

BJC

I got so upset watching the show my husband made me turn it off. I too hoped that it might help teens decide to be more careful but even with all her struggles, I feel the show still managed to make teen pregnancy look cool.

As an aside to the actual content -- it bugged me that the "soundtrack" was so MARKETED, songs were a little too loud, and then the song name and site for purchasing music crawling across the bottom. To me, that just highlighted how in the end, no matter what we wish for with this kind of documentary television, it's not about educating anyone, but rather about selling stuff.

I think that perhaps being born at age 80 and then slowly reverting back to your childhood would be a good idea. At least you wouldn't make stupid decisons so early on in life. Teenagers are so dumb.

I wonder if there are any side effects to temporary sterilization.

Hopefully this show will open the eyes of the 16-year-olds who might otherwise go down this path. We can hope, anyway! :)

Unfortunately, I'm pretty sure that there are a huge group of girls watching that show going "My boyfriend isn't like that at all... that won't happen to us". That's right up there with "BUT I LOVE HIM!!!" as he ditches her for his friends. I sometimes hate teenage girls. And I was one. Ugh.

I saw it too. Crazy show! I wonder what the 16 year olds that watch it think about it. I still think that teenagers will walk away from a show like that thinking that they feel sorry for the girls on TV but that that is a situation that would never happen to them. I think it's hard to convince teenagers otherwise!

I had my daughter at 22 an don't think I would have survived if I had her a day earlier!

About 10 years ago, I lived in a 2-story townhouse with paper thin walls. The couple next door had a baby, and the husband/fiance/boyfriend/whatever would sit downstairs and YELL for the wife/fiancee/girlfriend/MOTHER when the baby started to cry. Think Marlon Brando in "Streetcar" - except, "TINA! TINA!" So, screaming baby and yelling father. The parents were in their mid-twenties.

Found out later that he was having an affair... because I had actually met the mistress with him before I met the wife, but didn't realize they weren't the same person (met in passing) and called her by the wrong name. LOTS of yelling that night!

I have a 6 week old, and a 3 1/2 year old, and it's hard enough at 30+ that I cringe to think of me having a baby at half that age.

Wow. I can't imagine being 16 with a baby. I was 26 with a baby, and that was fucking HARD. There is no real way to comprehend the toll that it takes to raise a child. Although i love my little boy like crazy, it was still extremely hard to go from being single and thinking only of myself to being completely wrapped up in taking care of someone else. I cried many, many tears. Then I had to grow up. No way was I ready for that responsibility at 16.

I was responding to your sad tweets during the show because I was thinking the same thing you were. So sad.

I was impressed that the girl got her shit together but felt bad for her that the boy was going to always dissapoint her.

One of my niece's friends, at 15, said she wanted a baby because it would "love her unconditionally."

No, sweetie, a baby NEEDS you unconditionally. Big difference.

It was a strange day back in the mid-90's when I realized that I was no longer the target audience for MTV. They used to play music occasionally, didn;t they?

I'm going to take this opportunity to ride my very high horse. I don't own television.

BUT outside of that, lol, when I was a teenager, my cousin had a baby. We were allowed to visit her in the labor room and wish her well (she'd been on bedrest for a couple months, so it wasn't a new scene).

Oh my goodness, as soon as I saw what was going on DOWN THERE, I walked out and told my father that I was never having sex, amen. He was all "why didn't I think of this tactic before?"

It worked though. I didn't touch or look at boys for years because I knew what sort of evil things could happen to my body because of them and their sperm lol.

Kudos to you, seedmomma. I remember early in the months with my first kid thinking how hard it would be to do this as a teen. I was 28 and crying every day.

I saw this show for the first time last night and...eeewwww. It was so hard for me to watch, despite the fact that, at 26, I'm safely out of the teen pregnancy danger zone. I guess it came off as a pretty formulaic show, but when the boyfriend left the screaming baby on the sofa while mama was trying to study, I wanted to slug him (to put it mildly). It at no point seemed to register with that dipshit that the kid was half his.

LOL I have a niece named Bentley.

Steph

I am 22 and have a 5 year old. It is not "cool" to have a child when you are 16 nor is it easy. It is fucking hard. Although, with all the adversity my peers and I face - we still come out better parents then most adults.

I would never do it again as I have learned from my mistakes/wrong choices - I will show my daughter and set a good example for her to grow up to be an amazing woman - no matter what the circumstances are, and you better believe me that I will educate her more than anything about teen pregnancy in order for her to NOT BE ANOTHER STATISTIC.

I suppose the 16 and pregnant should go along with "Bad Mother"? eh??

What's more depressing, that particular couple had a very similar fight as I had with my husband a couple weeks after our kid was born. And we're both securely in our late twenties/early thirties. So ... that was humbling. (And who names their kid Bentley?)

I am from Texas, and I was 23 and married before I had a kid. Just sayin'.

I have never heard of the show nor do I have cable. Not because I don't want it, but just because it isn't something that I want to pay for right now.

Either way, I would think that the show would be depressing, and I think that it is awful that so many teens nowadays think that it is okay to get pregnant and some of them actually WANT to get pregnant. And like someone said before "they wouldn't be in that type of situation. Their boyfriend would be great, blah blah blah."

This world has become a sad place.

Oooh Steph - that is a great idea. I think that might even be permanent birth control - at least if they come to my house!

I watched...and cried...and then scoffed at how immature kids are. I was pleasantly surprised at how the girl got her priorities in order and was at least willing to give up what she knew would not allow her to spend time with her child. Either way i hope it shows teens the reality of having a baby but i know it won't. Teens have the it will never be that way for me type attitude and of course their immature boyfriend would be the perfect daddy and hubby!

I didn't catch the show but it would probably just depress me, too. But I imagine a better sterilization tool for those teens would be to maybe show them footage of, like, a day at my house with 4 kids and me living in my gaucho pants.

Steph

MTV has become a sign of the apocalypse. I'm convinced.

I saw a clip of this show on the Jezebel site the other day. It was horribly depressing.

I can't believe they made a TV show out of this situation. No one better think this looks "cool". Ugh!

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