It's Electric - Now with a Shah
Um, er, well at least I can zip it, right?
[The nursing tank underneath was my own personal touch]
Here it is, Virginia. The Shah. (As spelled by my FIL) or Shaw. (As spelled by my SIL). It's so freaking short and wide that I have no idea exactly how it's supposed to stay on.
*Off to bang my head against a wall*

truly, that's a better dress than my daughter has stuck her sister with. I dread retribution in a few years.
http://mail.google.com/mail/?ui=1&view=att&th=11ef12bdd8494dfa&attid=0.1&disp=inline&realattid=f_fq5r6vxh0&zw
(one of the maids is in brown, the other in blue, with opposite colored trim, in a probably pointless attempt to reconcile two completely different complexions)
The most painful part of the plan, my mother of the bride dress, remains unchosen. It doesn't help that in addition to my grown up lovelies, I have their recently arrived 2 yr old brother to deal with. At an outdoor wedding in a large public park (god help me, don't let the playground be in sight.) And all of this happens less than two weeks after we move back from overseas...
Posted by: let's be anon today (since my kids googled my screen name once) | March 10, 2009 at 09:28 AM
Oh my goodness THANK YOU!!!
I think you got in the pic- wear it as a headscarf with only your eyes showing. You could even tell the fam you are thinking of converting. I am assuming they would lose their shit over that, and really, one good turn deserves another.
You still look beautiful.
Posted by: Virginia | March 09, 2009 at 07:08 PM
At least there no hoopskirt, right? (seriously, I had to wear a hoopskirt with a bridesmaid dress)
My son's name is Shaw.
Posted by: Lou | March 09, 2009 at 03:19 PM
not that i think you need the 'shah,' but maybe you could get some of those little bobbie pins they make that have the little sparklies on them. i don't know, that's' what i would do.
they'd hardly be noticeable, and they'd keep it in place pretty well, i'm sure.
Posted by: supertiff | March 09, 2009 at 08:36 AM
rather, they end up looking like
Posted by: missmismeliss | March 08, 2009 at 07:51 PM
Yes, you can microwave Peeps (they end up look liking they have a terrible case of elephantiasis). Whether you should or not is an entirely different question.
Posted by: missmismeliss | March 08, 2009 at 07:50 PM
But on the up-side, you have a tea set in your bathroom, so there's that.
Posted by: Stimey | March 08, 2009 at 07:22 PM
you really are a hottie.
Posted by: brad | March 08, 2009 at 12:25 PM
You can microwave peeps?
Sorry about the dress!
Posted by: Red Cup Mom | March 07, 2009 at 11:14 PM
http://us.st12.yimg.com/us.st.yimg.com/I/candywarehouse_2040_205858323
For real, you could try accessorizing with some of them. You'll get a great deal once Easter is over.
Posted by: missmismeliss | March 07, 2009 at 07:49 PM
Also...
are you gonna wear the nursing bra with straps for the wedding? 'Cause it really does add a whole other level of C.L.A.S.S. to the get-up.
Posted by: missmismeliss | March 07, 2009 at 07:46 PM
I suggest you bury it, not in the back of your closet, but far, far beneath the surface of the earth where future generations will never excavate it and wonder WTF?!
Seriously though, the style looks great on you. The color, on the other hand, reminds me of... Easter eggs. Or marshmallow Peeps. Yeah. Peeps. It's got the same sugary sheen. I wonder if it would explode in a similar fashion if placed in the microwave.
Posted by: missmismeliss | March 07, 2009 at 07:44 PM
I have been a bridesmaid 9 FREAKING times!!!!
Can't decide which was worse, my sister's pink satin with white lace over-lay AND gloves, or the irridescent green/black tafetta, 2 peice number with rhinestones on the butt and such a tight, floor length skirt that we all ended up attacking it with scissors by the end of the night! WTF???
My fav one was a simple, navy blue, tea length, cotton Ralph Lauren, still have it, still wear it, the 'friend'.... I have no idea what happened to her!
I say, put your happy face on, have a couple of glasses of wine and dance till the dress falls off!!!
Enjoy!
jp
Posted by: jp | March 07, 2009 at 04:58 PM
Some brides are so mean. Hai I've picked the weirdest/fuglyist colored dress I could find, please enjoy.
At least it doesn't have shoulder puffs.
Posted by: Issa | March 07, 2009 at 11:57 AM
I have to say I don't think the color is THAT bad...it just doesn't work in that style of dress (too prom-ish), and probably isn't the best color for your skin tone. Blue is very hard to pull off...it has to be just the right shade to look good. I actually had to wear a bridesmaid dress that color (maybe a shade or two different), but it was a halter top and tea length skirt with black sash and black wrap. It worked. There's just something weird about that dress style. And that kind of material is hard for anyone to wear.
On a side note, I've been asked to be a bridesmaid 4 times. So I have 4 bridesmaid dresses - 4 different colors, 4 completely different styles. And thankfully, 4 friends with great taste in dresses! I've actually worn mine again. But I suggest you bury yours at the back of your closet when you're done. :)
Posted by: The Other Sister-in-Law | March 07, 2009 at 08:47 AM
And you guys ARE SO NICE.
Thank you.
Posted by: Motherhood Uncensored | March 07, 2009 at 06:58 AM
You look amazing. Sorry. It's true. I'm convinced nothing could look bad on you.
Posted by: nikoline | March 07, 2009 at 02:54 AM
And you can be Cinderella on Halloween!
Posted by: Hyphen Mama | March 07, 2009 at 01:12 AM
it's a good thing you're gorgeous. otherwise, you know...you might look less than desirable in that ridiculous outfit. Why are brides so MEAN??
xoxo
b.
Posted by: just beth | March 07, 2009 at 12:10 AM
OMG, upon closer inspection, I have realized that that horrible dress is identical to the horrible dress hanging in my closet from my SIL's wedding last May... except mine's red (which is better than your blue). And, I'm sorry to say that I looked HORRIBLY fat in every picture. The good news is that it wasn't that bad to breastfeed in, just shove the front on down. Be careful that the baby doesn't drip a little though because the stain is VERY apparent on the satin.
-Abby
(The bridesmaid with the boob juice stain.)
Posted by: abbyjess | March 06, 2009 at 10:56 PM
My dad used to have car painted that color. Seriously.
But you look a lot better than that car.
Posted by: the mama bird diaries | March 06, 2009 at 10:17 PM
Please, please, please post a pic of The SHAW. I feel like it is some otherworldly item of clothing that we all must see to believe.
Posted by: Virginia | March 06, 2009 at 09:15 PM
For me, the color kills it. But the style wouldn't be bad if the skirt wasn't swingy. If it was a stiffer satin material, it would be more modern and less.
Yeah. PROM.
Posted by: Motherhood Uncensored | March 06, 2009 at 08:44 PM
So yeah the brides pick these atrocities. But someone has to make them, right? That's really who we have to blame for bridesmaids dresses.
I only had to do the bridesmaid dress thing once. It was a dress so ugly that you wouldn't even make curtains out of it.
My wedding, they wore off the rack Jessica McClintock.
Posted by: Susan Getgood | March 06, 2009 at 08:18 PM
It's dresses like this that make me very grateful I've never been asked to be a bridesmaid.
On the plus side, you only have to wear it in public once, right?
Posted by: missmismeliss | March 06, 2009 at 08:15 PM
If you don't get a matching corsage and a slow dance to Freebird I would totally demand a refund.
Posted by: Mom101 | March 06, 2009 at 08:05 PM
you look awesome. The dress, not so much. Looks like it'd be easy to pop a teat out the top, though, so there is the convenience factor. Is that what the bride was going for? :-)
Posted by: sueinithaca | March 06, 2009 at 07:20 PM
I have to say, as others here have said, you look great, but that's one butt ugly dress.
Posted by: Mandy | March 06, 2009 at 03:56 PM
A blue princess ready to take off and flap her wings.....
:)
Posted by: Anita Ovolina | March 06, 2009 at 03:27 PM
Did you fall and get tangled up in the shower curtain?
Posted by: Stacy Quarty | March 06, 2009 at 02:51 PM
Okay, but WHAT YEAR were these dresses worn?
Seriously. It's 2009. I can't believe they still sell these.
Posted by: Motherhood Uncensored | March 06, 2009 at 02:31 PM
It could be much, much worse. Think tiers and poufy sleeves or ruffles.
You should totally get a fake tan and dayglo pink lipstick, though.
Posted by: Naomi | March 06, 2009 at 02:24 PM
You still look beautiful!
Posted by: Cecilia | March 06, 2009 at 02:04 PM
Ever watch 27 Dresses? Great love story movie, REALLY bad bridesmaid dresses! REALLY bad... This could be SO much worse. That color is just too bright though, why do they do that? What's wrong with muted, soft tones when it comes to a wedding party? Is the groom wearing a tux this color, too? I'd make him, lol.
Posted by: Chelle | March 06, 2009 at 01:44 PM
There just are no words for that.
Wait, sadly it reminds me of my prom dress.
Posted by: Jenn | March 06, 2009 at 01:33 PM
@sam/temptingmama -- are you kidding? It has a matching SHAW (to quote my SIL)
OR SHAH -- if you're my FIL.
Posted by: Motherhood Uncensored | March 06, 2009 at 12:37 PM
Hey, it could be worse!
I can't think of how, but if you give me some time, I'm sure I'll come up with something...
Posted by: Sarah @ BecomingSarah.com | March 06, 2009 at 12:31 PM
A. sorry you have to wear that dress. it will look nice in the hotel trash can.
B. At least it fits. You look as cute as you can in a dress that color.
C. unless the wedding is outside on a beach somewhere, I don't see why that color would ever be an option.
Posted by: Amy H | March 06, 2009 at 12:19 PM
Just think, when you're done the shred, you're going to look so fuckin' hot no one's going to look at the dress.
Too positive?
Ya. Um... a pashmina shawl maybe?
Posted by: sam {temptingmama} | March 06, 2009 at 12:17 PM
OMG I'm so sorry you have to wear that.
Posted by: Jen S | March 06, 2009 at 12:14 PM
And I thought you were exaggerating about the dress...
Posted by: Jill J | March 06, 2009 at 11:51 AM
I think you should wear the nursing tank and converse on the day. HAWT!
Posted by: Emily | March 06, 2009 at 11:50 AM
WOW. Truthfully, YOU look amazing, the dress... Not so much.
Sending my most sincere condolences..
Posted by: Minnie | March 06, 2009 at 11:36 AM
Where's the guitar?
Posted by: Rita's husband | March 06, 2009 at 11:35 AM
I'm still cracking up about the idea of you having to breastfeed wearing that thing. Ugh ... :)
Gotta say I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE your blog! I'm hooked, so bad! As the mom of two kiddos, I find myself saying, "been there!" over and over again.
Ummm, I'm glad I can't say that about this dress, however. You can rock it, though.
Posted by: Kay | March 06, 2009 at 11:25 AM
I am so very sorry. Well, at least you won't feel bad about letting the kiddos use it to play dress-up, right?
-Abby
@sweetbabboo
Posted by: abbyjess | March 06, 2009 at 11:14 AM
Um, I hate to be mean, but I thought you were showing us your old prom dress too. Maybe it looks better in person?
Posted by: Sarah | March 06, 2009 at 10:55 AM
I once wore a hot pink so bright, I swear we glowed in the dark. That blue is something else as well! You look lovely though!
Posted by: Fairly Odd Mother | March 06, 2009 at 10:54 AM
@metrodad--AAAH HA HA HAAA! If ONLY it was going to be as much FUN as the prom. lmao.
Posted by: TNG | March 06, 2009 at 10:51 AM
@VeepVeep -- I did the same thing. Black. Pick what you like. The End. It actually looked cool. I'm not so much into uniformity.
Posted by: Motherhood Uncensored | March 06, 2009 at 10:12 AM
Dude, right now my bridesmaids are LOVING me. Black, knee length strapless dresses that they've each worn more than once. Seriously! I've seen pictures!
Posted by: Mama Bub | March 06, 2009 at 10:00 AM
Eeeeeeek. Don't mind the color (of course! lol) but the style is not going to be flattering on anyone. Heavens.
I was so nice to my bridesmaids. Told them the color and let them pick the style they wanted.
Everyone was happy and they wore the dress several times after. lol
Posted by: Veep Veep | March 06, 2009 at 09:34 AM
I've seen worse. I've WORN worse.
I think you should wear the nursing tank with it. The black straps add that extra touch.
Posted by: Kimberly | March 06, 2009 at 09:34 AM
I've told you about my slutterific bridesmaid's dress, haven't I? The purple crepe atrocity with the plunging neckline that defied all boob support technologies and forced me to use some stick-on boob-lifting pasty thing that turned into modge-podged concrete and turned my tits into little cement cones? That one?
It was worse than yours.
Posted by: Her Bad Mother | March 06, 2009 at 09:28 AM
oooh, this is a NEW dress?!? Here I thought you were bragging about squeezing back into your prom dress...ugh.
Posted by: Kerrie | March 06, 2009 at 09:13 AM
@Jill -- "Lipstick I found in the parking lot" -- sort of goes with the dress. LMAO.
Thanks for reminding everyone of my redneckness :)
@Metrodad -- HAHA. Prom.
Posted by: Motherhood Uncensored | March 06, 2009 at 09:12 AM
Oy. My bridesmaids picked out their own dresses (and they chose the color too) both times I got married. So, they all looked pretty darn good. The dress isn't great, but you look fabulous anyway.
Oy. Seriously? The fabric with that color?
Posted by: Mary | March 06, 2009 at 09:08 AM
Ok, the dress is HORRID, but you make it look great :)
Posted by: S | March 06, 2009 at 08:56 AM
Um..yeah. I'm goina go out on a limb and say no, no, please don't do that. This is similar to the blue polyester funeral suit that Mr. Man wore once and looking back, realized that we were in a different era.
But the blue really sets off those straps!
Posted by: mannequin | March 06, 2009 at 08:51 AM
This is a joke...the real bridesmaid dress is in your closet still, right?
However, you will still make a lovely bridesmaid whatever you MUST wear.
Posted by: Kristen | March 06, 2009 at 08:44 AM
I think you should definitely keep the nursing tank on during the wedding. Make it your own, yo. You got this.
Posted by: Becky | March 06, 2009 at 08:37 AM
Prom is going to be AWESOME this year!
Just kidding. You look great. The dress is frightening.
Posted by: MetroDad | March 06, 2009 at 08:37 AM
It's a nice simple design. Not too fussy. I wouldn't have picked that color, but if it's a spring wedding, it might work. You can rock it, girl! Get out that lipstick you found in the parking lot and get to it!
Posted by: Jill | March 06, 2009 at 08:35 AM
I agree with lynna gotta love the tea set. In fact the dress looks just like something I would were to a tea party with my daughter. Talk about post partum BLUES! I hope the bride was in a dark room when she picked that out!
Posted by: Mom O 4 | March 06, 2009 at 08:04 AM
I'm sure that with your hair done and your bouquet in hand, you will look stunning when the day arrives. Until then, put the easter egg dress away. I hope you really like the woman whose wedding you are in. Ooof.
Posted by: Pia | March 06, 2009 at 07:50 AM
The dress may be an atrocity of John Hughesian proportions, but YOU, my dear, look fabulous. How is it that you look so fab so soon? I'd be jealous and bitter, but I"m attempting to rise above such petty emotions. (*cough*bitch!*cough) heh.
Posted by: MeL - Stay at Aum Mom | March 06, 2009 at 07:49 AM
Makes me feel slightly less guilty about making my bridesmaids wear lavender. Just slightly. (I apologize on a regular basis to them now. How could I do that to them?!)
Posted by: Heather | March 06, 2009 at 07:15 AM
I especially love the tea service on the sink! Looks like my bathroom looked back when my kids were little.
Posted by: Lynna | March 06, 2009 at 07:10 AM
I see a little more detailing on the second one there. And the color looks a leetle better in that one.
But OI.
You're going to be SOME robin's egg, sister.
Posted by: The New Girl | March 06, 2009 at 06:10 AM
I love the color.
But why do brides make their attendants wear clothing they would never wear normally??? (Mind you, I am guilty of that also.)
Love the black straps ... think you can get away with them on the day?!!
Posted by: Michelle | March 06, 2009 at 05:50 AM