I can understand that the sight of a boob while you're enjoying your 99 cent breakfast might be less than appetizing. You worked hard for that sunny side up egg with a side of cheesy grits and ham hock, and you don't want some old dirty boobie to spoil it.
But shit, who, other than college students and desperate travelers, eats at Denny's anyway? Since when did people with no teeth get upset about seeing a boob?
Okay, so maybe they have teeth. But still.
I guess I really shouldn't be surprised that it was the after-church group who were offended by the boobs. The devil hates on boobs. BOOBS ARE SINNERS. Thou shalt not expose part of your boob to feed your child.
Go forth to the dirty ass restroom that some trucker just took a shit in and feed your kid in there YOU DIRTY WHORE!
In all honesty, I can appreciate the annoyance at seeing a boob (OMG A BOOB) while eating your biscuits and gravy, but it's not like she's flapping it around right in your face. Once the baby latches on, all you see is the actual breast and not the terrible, horrible, no good VERY BAD nipple.
And actually, North Carolina law protects breastfeeding mothers who even have their big bad brown nipples hanging out.
I know, I know. You've seen the wretchedly exposed breast of a nursing mom and you were offended. Your eyes were bleeding. Seriously? Enough to make you get up and leave a restaurant (and calling Denny's a restaurant is being mighty generous)?
I've sat through stinky ass farts, some dude's ass crack hanging out, and a kid with a gigantic booger hanging out of his nose. I don't see them getting sent to the restroom.
The only time you'll see my nipple (in case you're looking), is when I'm trying to attach the baby. Once that happens, all you see is her head.
So when it comes down to it, I think people are actually offended by the act of feeding a baby from the breast and just use the boob as an excuse. We're only annoyed with boobs when they're not doing what they've been told to do for way too many years - sit nicely in a push-up bra or pleasure our husband in the privacy of our own bedrooms.
So please don't tell me that it's the "exposed breasts" that bother you. Because when it comes down it, you've just never really seen them do what they were made for in the first place.
[Thanks for the tip, Jessica. Full story and video here]