A Redneck Mommy Makeover
1. Free cosmetics, found on the ground of your *grocery store parking lot.
2. Apply generously. And show your boobies.
[I can't compete with Tanis, my favorite redneck mommy, who just added a gorgeous little boy to her family. We're celebrating her awesomeness this weekend. Share your redneck mommy moments and be entered to win some amazing redneck prizes. And if you'd like to contribute to her gift, then you can do that too!]
*The Cover Girl lip stain was fully sealed, of course. I'm not a complete redneck. And if you saw it up close and personal, then you'd know why someone left it on the ground.
Usually when a woman becomes a mommy, forgets all about taking care of herself. Plastic surgery does that for her these days. And I think it's normal at some point to start again paying attention to the way you look.
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Posted by: Ella30 | February 11, 2010 at 01:32 AM
My rack totally wants to meet your rack. Also, I bought the CoverGirl lipstain! Actually I INTENDED to, erm, forget to pay for it but I forgot until I was up by the cashier and I didn't want to be all obvious. I like it though which is a good thing. Esp cute w/a sheer red over it and really does last!
much like our cleavage...if you doubt me clicky click to my page and you can see from my blog photo that, well, both of us were standing in the right line when cleavage was showered about!
Posted by: Elena | February 23, 2009 at 11:15 PM
They didn't "leave" it on the ground - it fell out of the bag that they had secretly shoved it into when the security cameras were facing the other way.
Nice rack, mama!
Posted by: Mom101 | February 16, 2009 at 08:05 AM
I've got your beat. I have three motors in my front yard, along with a 25,000 ton wench, four Super Swamper tires, two radiators and a rusty old burn barrell.
Posted by: SuZ | February 14, 2009 at 03:25 PM
Not really a redneck "mommy" story, but my wife and I did rent a cheap motel room next to a strip joint one night in Tampa when we were on our way to plan our beach wedding.
and we got some cheap liquor to make scre...er..sleeping on the sweaty trucker sheets more tolerable.
does that count?
Posted by: SD's Husband | February 14, 2009 at 03:09 PM
Does letting my kid go without shoes and socks in the stroller in chilly March count?
Posted by: Karen (submommy) | February 14, 2009 at 03:03 PM
Yay, free makeup! (Am I a redneck for thinking that way?)
My son spit his milk out the other day and I didn't have a spit rag handy, so I grabbed one of his socks (he always takes them off as soon as I take his shoes off) and wiped his mouth, much to my husband's horror. :)
Posted by: Jen L. | February 14, 2009 at 12:08 PM
Wow.
Posted by: Heather | February 14, 2009 at 11:02 AM
Hey free lipstick is free lipstick!! Save it for the next time you want to be a whore for Halloween!
My redneck mommy post will be up tomorrow!
Posted by: Jill | February 14, 2009 at 09:11 AM
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Don't think I'll be able to look at a Cover Girl lip stain the same way again.
Posted by: The Other Sister-in-Law | February 14, 2009 at 05:13 AM
Uh.
Posted by: Backpacking Dad | February 14, 2009 at 01:56 AM
Man I just don't know if i can tell a story like that! Or if I qualify for anything of that "level" but I'd say..the other day my kids pooped real bad. I didn't have time to bathe him, my other kids had to be at school. I quickly brainstormed how the hell was I going to get the nasty stench off his legs so that my friend who i was supposed to meet later that morning wouldn't notice. Vinegar! It takes funny smells out of my laundry right?! Well I swabbed that babe down with vinegar and he didn't smell squeaky clean but it worked and he was fine.
Now I feel Like I should post a pic of my cleavage or something.
Posted by: beth | February 14, 2009 at 12:17 AM
Whoa
Posted by: 10lbs | February 14, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Day-um woman.
Them is some powerful boobies.
Your rack puts mine to shame.
Thank you love.
For the shower.
But mostly for the rack shot.
You do know how to cement yourself in my heart. Wink.
Posted by: Redneck Mommy | February 13, 2009 at 10:41 PM