My son has taken to harrassing my computer to get my attention. With sick kids and husband, that meant no sitter, extremely tired mommy who fell asleep at 9pm, and work (crazy, busy work) in between making dinner and doing laundry loads.
Holy mother of laundry.
Not surprisingly, his kicks and scratches at my computer screen irritate me, and I pick myself up from my work, drag him to the corner, and threaten to take away his beloved hammer if he moves. And then I feel absolutely terrible and cuddle him as long as he can stand it.
It's become a daily ritual in our relationship. More like a bad habit.
This is not only the challenge of two kids under two (and three under four), but also the nature of my newborn who enjoys the sling over any expensive piece of baby gear crowding my living room. Most of all, I think it has to do with the personality of my loving, cuddly, and vibrant son (read: clingy, grabby, and crazy) who cannot occupy himself for longer than three minutes. And that was when he was pulling apart my kitchen cabinets.
Yo Gabba Gabba got me a solid two minutes and then even the bouncing one-eyed red thing got old. My husband says he likes the Wiggles but I have yet to actually observe this Christmas miracle.
He says "Look Mom, Look Mom" every other minute, displaying his amazing skill at dumping out the lego bin, knocking down Quinlan's block creations, and attempting to mop his little sister's head. The more I tell him to stop doing something, the more he does it; partly his age, partly my parental neglect.
The truth is, I really miss my kids. I do what I can to read the bedtime stories, and dote on them, even if it is to the tune of a screaming baby left abandoned on the bed for a few minutes. But even then it's hard to leave the crying one to tend to another. It's hard to put one down to pick another one up.
I know it is enough, or at least, it will have to be for now.
But I hope they know that I hold them all tightly together in my heart. Even if I can't fit them all on my lap.