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January 13, 2008

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That's the kind of image that i really thing is super image like. If more images very real like this were out there we'd be super full of graet images in the world.

KY. Didn't give it to her purposefully, but once she squirted it out I figured: eh

hell yeah!

Right now Mira is playing with a very pointy knitting needle.

Panty-liner stickers!

I am such a bad momma. One day the little guy was finally content when he found a toddler hanger in the floor. It was all good until he gagged himself with it.

He is a squirmy little thing now and just yesterday I let him play with a small container of lotion. That all ended when he almost sliced my face open with one end. Probably not a good idea. At least it was me who got scratched.

I know I have given them strange things just can't think of any right now.

I let my son chew on my husband's shoe laces. A little gross but it won't kill him.

I think every mom is guilty of this.

Archer's favorite toy for a good year was a box of tampax. Go team!

Well, I discovered that handing a pantiliner to the youngest while in the car would shut her up while she tried to figure it out. Unfortunately, she liked them so much that some time later, she found the box of them in the bathroom and peeled the backs off all the ones in the entire box and stuck them to the floor and walls!

I guess she observed more than I gave her credit for because she ended up sticking one to herself because she wanted to wear it "like Mommy". She didn't realize it was supposed to go on her panties and not on her tulip.
Needless to say, taking that thing off her wasn't fun. OUCH!

iPhone. works every time.

oh my! well, sanitary products remain fluffy's top seller. he has a whole STASH in his room: tampons, liners, maxis with wings (a front runner), you name it, i once had it.

honestly? we let our 2yr old son play with screwdrivers, hammers, power drills, scissors...all to occupy him while we work construction on our store...and as a result he's become a pretty good helper.

keys, books, mommy's credit cards, shoes, garbage (long story)

All of the above. My daughter decided it would be fun to lock her brother into the dog kennel. I paused for a few seconds, before I told her to let him out. It was a blissful few seconds.

dog crate

dog toys

empty coke bottles

unopened coke cans (cold ones make excellent teething items)

hairball the cat left on floor

upturned laundry basket

nasal syringe

i'm fairly certain i haven't given your son anything to occupy him, but the next time i have some trash to get rid of, i know where i'll be taking it! ;)

Empty pop bottles
Keys
Old magazines she can rip to shreds
An empty bottle of Infant Motrin
TV remote
The phone
My toothbrush (so I could get my makeup on)
And anything else that doesn't look like it will fatally harm her while I try and get something done!

Broken pottery. Ok I did not know he had broken the dog bowl while he was playing with. I was just happy he was being so good while I was having a work melt-down. When the melt-down was over, I looked over and he was playing with broken shards. I am not a good mom, but I am a luck one.

Oh so many great ideas. I can't wait to tell my husband.

Unintentionally: Recently by dint of a horrid oversight on my part, not unpacking my overnight bag after a work meeting in Rotterdam, my six year old daughter found a "magic stone" in my bag. The magic stone is a Lelo Nea, a beautifully craft vibrator that is like a smooth and polished beach stone. I did not realize that she had it for a week while I search the house high and low for it. In the end I looked in on her and some friends as they had a sleep over at our house to see them playing witches and spells and chanting over the "magic stone as it purred away on the little alter they had set up. Later that night one of their spells must have worked because the stone mysteriously vanished ( and re-appeared safely back in my locked toy draw). That was the end of the matter, NO.

I was collecting the children from school and was approached by a couple of the other mothers who came to say how their daughters had enjoyed their sleep over. They all also asked where I bought the magic stone because they daughters had talked about nothing since. How could I tell them that their daughters were some ten years or more from needing and appreciating the true value of the magic stone. In the end I decided that a "Magic Stone" deserved some real mystery so I said I did not know where Hilke had found the stone, or where it had gotten to. Perhaps it will magically reapper one day.

I remember the pad and pops from BlogHerCon last year. I would have done the same thing.

No idea. If it doesn't end up in her diaper, I'm satisfied.

dude.

As long as it won't kill her (instantly) I give her whatever. the. eff. she wants. lmao.

chocolate truffle wrapper (crinkly sound kind).

Spoons (her own).

Whatever tubes she can grab from her changing table.

Any electronic device within reach.

She got herself one of the dog's raw-hides without me seeing.

blblajglolbiklkkkaaakkaaakkk.

wooden spoons
yep, tampons
housekeys
the collapsible laundry basket
cardboard boxes
cookie cutters

Hah! This is so funny! I remember hyperventilating over my first daughter playing with a highlighter when she was about a year old, and by the time my second kid was able to sit up, I was like, here, have a steak knife. Whatever.

Right this second:
Xbox 360 demo case (comes free with some d*mn 6 dollar magazine my husband buys)

Also used:
empty water bottle
sharpie markers
baby monitor
spatulas
tampons
toothbrush(hers)
salt shaker

And there's probably 50 more that I learned not to give her. The hard way

I once let my daughter happily rummage in the cabinet under the sink while I used the facilities. I looked and she had the toilet brush in her hand, and as I was reaching to take it away (small bathroom) she LICKED IT. Needless to say, the brush got moved out of range with a quickness. I still don't kiss her on the lips, and that was like a year ago...

Oh yeah....and pens, wine bottle corks, golf balls, soup cans.....

Oh man.....tons of stuff. Let's see.....

drinking straws
an ice cream scoop
ponytail holders
a tube of KY (closed of course!)
Aquaphor
napkin rings
the phone
vaccuum cleaner attachments

the list goes on....

-a pad of post-its
-colander with a handle (it's a bug net, hat and big spoon)

I'm guilty too...BBQ tongs, whisk, wrist watch.

The best one, I gave my 4 year old all the tupperware in the cabinet and asked him to match all the lids....hell I can never match them.

My blackberry. My *work* blackberry. An empty 12-pack beer box. Clean diapers - they have pictures of Elmo and Cookie Monster on them - at LEAST 5 minutes of peace.

GAH! I'm not the only one to use the tampon strategy. Thank God.

Also used the Buttpaste.

Also:

A bottle of prescription ibuprofen. It's childproofed, ya'll chill ;). Shake it like a Polaroid picture, lil' man...

A bottle of mustard. He became attached to it, so after we broke the seal, we had to empty the mustard into a separate container and return the bottle to him.

The lint trap from the dryer.

A small bag of chips (which miraculously remained unopened). Kept him occupied for thirty minutes.


plastic grocery bag

chop sticks

Bubble wrap.

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