INOGOTOLILRO

*New twisted updates to this situation below.

I have officially talked myself out of moving to Little Rock. It certainly helped that the living options were "deplorable" as my husband put it. Granted, my husband thinks an empty cup sitting on my nightstand for longer than one day is "deplorable," but still, I trust him on this one.

Plus, I don't really want to go.

Our options included furnished off-base housing which, with two large dogs, it's pretty rough. The on-base furnished housing available to us is just as small and about the same amount of money.

So, for now, I'm staying here and he'll come home on the weekends.

We survived "Week One: Project Let's Hope Kristen Doesn't Go Nuts Alone With Two Kids." Heck, I got out of the house twice! Sure, it wasn't until Thursday, but at least I got out.

Oh, and the cute guy at the Post Office smiled at me. Which was soooo great until I realized it was because I had a HUGE piece of food in my teeth.

And my daughter doesn't have all the Noggin theme songs memorized, although that's mainly because "Lazytown" really freaks me the fuck out, so I refuse to let her watch that one.

Amidst what was a crazy (but extremely productive, no?) work week, I played "Princess Hula-Girl Babysitter" and "Princess Strawberry Shortcake Cooking Show."

Yes, we watched our fair share of "Max and Boobies" (as I like to call it). But my daughter is slowly learning the words to the Beastie Boys' "Intergalactic" which she fondly calls "The Robot Song" with words like "Intergalactic Ambatary, Ambatary Intergalactic."

Pretty damn good parenting, if I do say so myself. I mean what three-year-old knows how to say "Intergalactic" huh?

And I am in search of a nanny. The money we'll save with me not moving there can be spent on some much needed help. Nothing major, just a few hours a few times a week might just allow me to get dressed before 4pm and get a shower more than twice a week.

Of course, since Atlanta is running out of water, I may be forced to shower less anyway. How cool would that be?? -- "Mom Singlehandedly Saves Atlanta Water Supply By Just Doing What She Does Everyday Which is Not Showering."

But honestly, my only real concern is what this is going to do to my marriage. It's already been like of those roller coaster rides that's really fun for about the first thirty seconds and then when all the crazy twists and turns come you just want to get the fuck off or vomit or both until you actually get off and realize that it wasn't really that bad and by holding on to each other, you survived and might actually like to do it again.

The truth is, however, that he calls to talk to the kids. And then I don't hear from him again for the rest of the night. And then when he comes home, he lays in bed, or vacuums the steps, or plays "The Best Daddy in the Whole Wide World Mommy You Suck Go Away Because Daddy Rocks."

I want to tell him about all the things that were going on with me. Not with the kids. Just with me.

But we will manage. I will manage. And considering my no-guilt policy (which includes not thinking about the fact that I took Q out of her potential preschool), I'm feeling pretty damn good.

Or maybe it's that I have officially returned to almost all my pre-pregnancy clothes.

And, thanks to a slowly dwindling milk supply, my pre-pubescent bras.

Eh. You can't win them all.

*Okay. So... apparently after the huz's disgust, the housing office came up with a 3br 1.5 bathroom stand alone furnished house on base this morning. We're taking it. So I am going. But not until after Christmas through April. Can this get ANYMORE ANNOYING?! UGH!

Comments

[justmylife]

My husband is home at night and on the weekends and I still get that Daddy rocks and Mommy sucks. Of course I am the one who makes them clean their rooms and he buys all the cool toys.Its a no win situation at my house. I give up, Daddy can rock and I will continue to make them clean their rooms.

[Belinda]

If you'll be on base? You won't technically be in Little Rock, you'll be in MY HOMETOWN. Totally within stalking distance.

So, are you really coming, or not? Quit jerking me around, here.

I'll babysit.

[bitsy parker]

Glad you're getting some babysitting help! So trite to say, but "I don't know how you do it all!"

[lisa]

I live in LR as well, and you might be surprised that you like it here. Nice people, great parks, good live music. There are worse places, trust me. It's temporary and you can probably stand it. There are places to find sitters, etc...Good luck!

[Shannon]

I live in Little Rock and call me crazy, but I love it here. Let me know if you need anything! I enjoy reading your blog so much...I'd be happy to help.

[Amanda]

I second what others have said, as much as moving stinks it will be great to be together as a family. And hopefully before your know it you will be back in Atlanta anyways.

Also, I did your survey, but wasn't sure how to email you to let you know that I did....

[Mldubose]

Advice:

Take it or leave it. I do recommend that once you get there that you find a sitter or 3 so that you can have "date night" every 2 weeks. Go to dinner somewhere that you don't take the kids. NO MOVIES!!!

So many times couples will forget who they are and get lost in work, childrearing, moving, military stuff, etc. Even if you worry that you won't have anything to talk about, it is SO important for you to reconnect during this time.

You may even need to budget this money to allow for this expense. But it is SO worth it. Otherwise, down the road, some couples will be paying a marriage counselor (I'm not accusing you guys of this). It will also give you an uplifting boost to get your legs shaved, put on a little makeup & perfume, and you will feel like your "batteries have been charged". That way the next week or so will feel easier to accomplish.

I'm not an advocate of dumping the kids off on someone else all the time, but to be a good mother, you have to take care of yourself first. And your marriage. Too often moms feel that if they're fulfilled then they've neglected their kids in some way. But it doesn't have to be that way.

As I said-- Just a tidbit of advice that you can use or not.

[Mldubose]

Well going to LR may be better than staying in Atlanta while Southerners figure out how to deal with a drought (which they should have been planning for 10 years ago!)

Besides, you know that if he stayed away from you during the week for months at a time, he was gonna make you flash your boobs at him over a webcam, don't you?

[Vicky]

Must be a sign that you need to be a family right now. I know that sounds incredibly sappy but it's quite possibly true. Good luck down there in LR. That place freaks me out but at least it's temporary. Hang in there!

Lazytown freaks you out. All of Yo Gabba Gabba freaks me out!

[Christy]

At least LR has water!

It will be alright. It is only a few months and then it will be back to life in the ATL. LR is not that terrible, either. Good luck with the move...I can't wait to hear what you think about LR.

[Manic Mommy]

Here's another vote for family unity. It's only temporary (again...). I think I'd kill myself if left all alone with the boys for six months with no relief.

Like the college kid idea. They must have colleges in Little Rock, right?

[Heather]

Wow. I feel like I'm riding the coaster with you.

Well, I hope the house isn't too deplorable.

[Christina]

OK, so you weren't going, and now you are, right?

Congrats?

I'm sorry?

Not sure which is the best one here. Pick whichever fits for the moment. And I hope it works out for the best. Either way, it'll all be over in April.

[motherbumper]

I'm so confused. I was up for you and then down. It sucks to be uprooted like that - even for 4 months. I'm checking back later to see if this changes again.

[The Other Sister-in-Law]

Oh Kristen, I'm sorry you're in such a tough situation. We're thinking of you. I just wish I could help you out.

[Kristen]

Another dimension?

I thought it was

I'm coming to get ya...

HAHA. Just kidding.

Bossy -- seriously, help me off too will ya?

[BOSSY]

Can you stop the ride? Bossy is dizzy and she's going to hurl.

[ali]

my husband taughtmy kids the words to intergalactic too.
the stupid song is in my head. all. friggin. day.
another dimension, another dimension....

[mothergoosemouse]

Hey, I know that "Mommy sucks/Daddy rocks" song. CJ's been singing it ever since Kyle came home from California.

Maybe I can get her started on Intergalactic instead.

[Jaci]

I didn't think it could get creepier than Teletubbies...until Lazy Town came out!

One of my kids is a Beastie Boys freak. I did a post last month with him 'breaking' to Intergalactic:
http://spiderbyte.vox.com/library/post/w-ill-communication.html

At least he's hipper than that kid on Lazy Town!

[divrchk]

As much as it sucks moving for a few months, it will be great for you to live as a family.

[rachel]

Well, there I was thinking we were finally going to get to have that drink after all. And there you go changing the plans again :)
This new plan sounds more comforting, and as it involves 2 months here, 4 months there, it comes in nice bite sized chunks.

[Jozet at Halushki]

I'm glad that you found a house that will work. :-)

And NO WAY is that baby 10 months old already! Are you KIDDING me?

[fidget]

I'd watch the little nippers for you a few hours a day but the commute between atlanta and orlando is a bitch. Though I could easily promise to keep up with the beastie boys skooling

[Mandie]

Your rollercoaster description is perfect.

[Dawn @ Coming to a Nursery Near You]

I hate Lazy Town too - but hubby has ummm gotten them for the kidlets and they like them and therefore, I shut the hell up lol

[Mrs. Chicky]

It doesn't sound perfect but it sounds like a good plan. Good luck on the nanny hunt!

[Rachel]

Seems like a sensible plan. I'm still happy to post to Emory's classifieds if you want to cast about for a sitter there, although the undergraduate availability hours can be weird. Otherwise, I have had great luck with craigslist in this town.

[Julie Pippert]

Sounds like a good plan! And Lazytown freaks me out, too. I mean, wow, so many levels of weird there.

Julie
Using My Words
http://theartfulflower.blogspot.com

[Amy]

Since MG was about 1 year old, we've had a girl from the local university come to watch her about 10 hours a week. BLISS. We can work around her school schedule, so that we don't lose her when the semester changes. She loves MG to pieces. She's 20 years old, and responsible. I pay her $50 a week, and we couldn't be happier.

I highly recommend you check out the local universities (especially those with education programs) rather than going through a service or something. Chances are you'll get an extremely responsible young lady, and you'll save a boatload of money (and save a young college girl from having to work in the cafeteria!).

Look on the bright side - your husband can always bring drinking water back to you from Little Rock. You'll be the only people in Atlanta who aren't dehydrated.