Everything She Needs to Know About the South She Learned From Shirley Temple

In my haste to celebrate Quinlan's bypassing the large princess dvd section at our local library or as she calls it "The Pwincess Collection MOMMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!," I allowed her to bring home something that had me wishing for a few pudgy fairies and a golden spindle.

Shirley Temple.

Yes, apparently my daughter has graduated from princess pink to "child actress forced to act for 12-hour days and wear curlers" pink. I was so excited that she decided to forgo the Disney movies that I looked at the rating (PG), threw it on the counter, and then shoved it in our DVD player faster than you can say "Good Ship Lollipop."

Except it wasn't the Good Ship Lollipop.

It was the Littlest Rebel.

You know, as in the Confederates. General Lee. Slaves. Damn Yankees *swoon*. Slaves. War. Death. Treason.   

The South.

Good times, particularly when you're fending off inquisitive three-year-old questions with your Super "Damn You're a Flipping Idiot" Mom wrist bands.

"Mommy, why are those black people serving all those children cake and ice cream?"

"Mommy, why are those men [Yankees] stealing their candles?"

It's clear that the Disney Princess movies are not without their fair share of huge life issues, but as I've come to learn, they're masked in cute songs, singing animals, and beaaaauuuutimous dresses.

And while Shirley Temple can tap a mean tap dance and whistle Dixie, she's still bossing around her slave and dance partner.

I'd call him her "caretaker" but clearly the dude is not getting paid. And chances are, he didn't ask to be there. 

Oddly enough, I'm more than happy to engage her in these types of conversations, not because they're easy, or have clear cut answers, but because it's my job.

My new job!

As I graduate from ass wiper and nose blower, I become the question answerer and discussion starter. I hold a wealth of knowledge about life by the reins and become guide and explorer.

It's exciting. It's scary.

And it does make just a little bit of me wish for the princesses if only they represent a bit of innocence lost. Where everything has a happy ending.  Where everything works out in the end.

But then I realize, it's my job to help her get to that place. Her happy ending is very much in my hands. And I'm here to do my best to send her in the right direction.

Straight North about 500 miles.

(heh)

Comments

[Katherine20Medina]

If you are willing to buy a house, you would have to receive the mortgage loans. Furthermore, my father always takes a term loan, which occurs to be the most reliable.

[Daisy]

Definitely, the old musicals. Sound of Music (you'll only have to explain the Nazis), The King and I (polygamy), Carousel (domestic abuse)...you get the picture. It sounds like you're doing fine, being available for questions whatever she sees.

[Erin Brown]

There is nothing better than having a very serious conversation with your child about something they are curious about. This morning my son caught a news broadcast about Hilary Clinton. He asked what that lady was doing talking in Washington, so I had to explain it to him. (He's 5). I told him who she was and that she was running to be the President of the United States. "Why are people picking on her mommy?" He asked. I told him it was because she was a woman and that people were leery of her winning the presidency because of that fact. He then said, "Yeah, I'd rather have a boy President at least he will know what he's doing!" If he only knew!

[canape]

I think though, that it is probably easier to talk to her about those issues of the South now that you don't live in Mississippi.

It was difficult learning it as "history" when so many freaking people were still living it that very day.

[Tee]

I have so had similar moments! I was so excited to let my boys watch The Goonies that I forgot how inappropriate some of it was. They thought it was hilarious when the penis broke off the statue. Oops.

[Redneck Mommy]

Let the good times roll, now that she's starting to ask questions.

There is nothing like shaping (and twisting) the young minds of tomorrow as a reward for parenting.

At least, that's my opinion. The psychiatrist from the adoption tells me this is wrong, but I stand by it.

[Kristen]

I certainly don't want to pretend that it didn't happen.

I just think it's a challenge to explain those things to our children -- I believe there's a part in all of us that wishes the world was as "pretty" a place as is depicted in some (not all) of the Disney movies.

But, pointing out its imperfections and speaking candidly and openly (age appropriately of course) with our kids is one of the best parts of being a parent.

[Kimba]

Hmmm...having grown up watching & loving Shirley Temple movies I can honestly say no one ever felt the need to explain slavery to me until I was actually old enough to understand it. And I still love those movies. Maybe because they represent an innocence far greater than most any (non-Disney) film today. Oh...and the fact that slavery & other dark things happened in history, why does everyone seem to want to just pretend it never happened? (Sorry...sleep deprivation makes one grumpy.)

[Suburban Oblivion]

A. Dayton is NOT the south.

B. The movie may have been about the confederacy, but at one point the north did have slavery also.

[Kara]

Aw, I like the princesses. But I got married at Disneyland!

[mothergoosemouse]

Dude, Dayton is not the south. God, I just about choked when I read that. Kentucky - yes. Dayton - no.

And watch Dumbo if you want more vestiges of the old south, courtesy of Disney. How to explain all of the black people putting up the circus tents...?

[BOSSY]

More like Shirley Nazi.

[Matilde]

No, no... I made the same mistake. I picked up a DVD of Shirley Temple short films from the $1 bin at Target. Cute she is... but stabbing someone in the bum with a fork is still not my idea of appropriate conflict resolution for my 4-year old.

[B]

At our neighborhood garage sale we happened to tell some man in overalls that we were new in town. He told us, "Well don't send your kids to the school up the street. It's getting awfully dark." To which my three year old replied, "Why don't they turn on the lights then?"

PS: I did say, "Well as long as the men aren't wearing overalls, I'm cool with that." He did not buy our couch.

[Phoenix]

Ooohhh I loved Shirly Temple movies. Maybe to get away from princesses and um slave and Death movies, you might want to try the musicals? Sound of Music, The King and I....you know maybe nothing is easy when it comes right down to it.

I have always thought it's better to let them ask questions and answer it in a way they can understand, than to not let them watch certain things. Then again, my favorite movie at five was Dirty Dancing, so maybe you'll just want to ignore anything I say. ;)

[Wendy]

I'm hoping I can answer all that stuff with, "hey, it's all pretend!! That's what movies are!!" :D

[Gretchen]

Oh sure, teaching them stuff is hysterical... wait until you see the eye rolls while you are trying to explain why someone from a movie in the 70's doesn't just look for something on the internet but has to go to the library...
or why they don't have cell phones...

[Lauraszoo]

Why don't comments have spell check???

Heck, just wait til she's 13. That's when the fun really starts.

[Lauraszoo]

Heck, just wait til she'd 13. That's when the fun really starts.

[Jesse]

Thank you! That's the funniest thing I've read all day. I refuse to even dwell on how much life -and vaginas- change after children tear through them ....

[Kristen]

Dayton IS the South LOL

[a happier girl]

My 4 year old recently asked me to explain the homeless guy on the corner begging for money. Being a parent is interesting.

[Christina]

So wait, you're sending her to Dayton, OH (~500 miles north)? I think the south might be better.

[Mrs. Chicken]

WOW. I bet Shirley wouldn't been too keen on remembering that she was in that piece of work.

And yes, it is scary and exciting. The Poo is going through some of the same stuff, and it is amazing how her mind works.