I know, I know. You'll love them even if you don't like what they choose to do. And you'll respect their choices as a well-informed adult.
Okay. Got it.
But don't tell me you don't dread the day your daughter comes home and decides to tell you she's Hef's 14th girlfriend.
You know you do. Admit it.
Your kid is still attached to your boob and you're already hoping and praying she doesn't decide to choose the highly rewarding job of shaking her butt on a nightly basis for some trucker named Jim-Bob with two teeth.
[Hef's 14th girlfriend ain't lookin' so bad now, huh? Particularly since he doesn't sleep with them, right? RIGHT?]
But equally as uncomfortable, at least in my opinion, are the people who stand on the street corners holding signs.
You do know what I'm talking about, don't you?
They are paid God only knows what to sit or stand holding some sign for some store in what always seems like the hottest day of the year. It makes no sense to me. Not only because it's not like they say anything interesting like "Destruction is near and Jesus is coming."
Hell, at least I could flip them off then.
But they're holding signs telling me about some 160K condos down the street from my subdivision that would do exactly the same thing if they were just stuck in the ground LIKE SIGNS SHOULD BE.
And really, the print is so damn small on those signs no one reads them. All they do, like me, is stare at the dude holding it and feel terrible that he has to hold it.
I know he's getting paid. I know there are worse things in life.
But why? Does it really guilt people into shopping for condos? Because all it makes me want to do is drive down to the sales office and yell at them for making that poor man stand out there with a FREAKING PEE JUG (I swear it had to be a pee jug. Or maybe it was a big thing of juice that he had already drank and was just holding onto because there was no trashcan or bathroom within a 3 mile radius).
At least let the man stand in a costume so he can cover his face. Give a big cow a sign and I'm buying $14 worth of fast food without even thinking about it.
But a random man with a random sign looking like he'd rather be having a chest hair wax.
Yeah. I say give Hef a call. At least he lets you piss in a toilet.
So, do sign holders make you uncomfortable? AND, what's one legal profession who hope your kid doesn't grow up to do. Don't worry, they don't read my blog...