How Much Do You Pay For Bad Service?

My husband and I enjoyed an evening at the theater last week courtesy of my mother-in-law. Yes. Apparently in all her crazy ways, she is a fairly good gift giver. Okay. I admit it. She's pretty damn stellar.

God. That was painful to say. Anyway...

Prior to our theater excursion, we grabbed dinner at a restaurant we found on the theater's website -- close by, decent recommendations, and good prices (for downtown Philly Theater District -- whatever the heck that means).

But holy moly the service was ridiculous.

We had to flag down our guy to get a water and then our drinks. We had to ask for bread and then olive oil. And we didn't get our second round of drinks until we had finished eating our fairly mediocre meal.

And so after spending around $85 for dinner we were posed with the question, how much do you tip? Quite frankly, the food was not totally awful. It was not worth what we paid, but that's not the waiter's fault. However, the service was beyond bad, and in that case, I'm all for low tipping.

Or no tipping.

Call in preggo hormones or getting old, but I just don't have the time or energy to tip people for bad service.

So, what do you do? Am I cruel?

--

I'll have the finalists for the "Quote Your In-Laws" contest up tomorrow so make sure to come back and vote. And I picked a winner of the DS LITE! Is it you? Go check and see....

Comments

[chanel xo]

As someone who was a waitress for over 5 years, I have absolute no qualms about leaving zippo for terrible service. People assume too often now that a tip is something granted, rather than earned. Do you tip McDonalds, for their minimum wage contributions? That's what I thought. I worked damn hard to remember every refill and frequent napkin service. If I didn't receive a tip, I reflected back on what I could've done wrong. When I got a marginal tip, I figured the person was cheap (Sorry! Being honest!). Point being - not tipping is the clearest, best way to get the message across that the service was not up to par. Maybe for the next table, they'll try extra hard to make up for their misdoings. If not, honestly it's not your fault. Not everyone is cut out for the service industry.

PS: Speaking to the manager is always good, too. They usually will offer some sort of discount :)

[Kristen]

Let me add that I've never NOT left a tip. I usually leave a small one and I try to speak to the manager. However, I will say that if someone were to come over, apologize, offer to comp us a drink or whatever, that would make the world of difference.

I don't think I should have to go to the manager for that. The server should know that "damn, I'm sucking today" and offer something in return.

No matter how busy you are -- you can communicate to the people waiting -- I'm so sorry, I'll be right there, etc. But being totally ignored sucks!

[Dawn]

I agree a small tip is an excellent way to get the point across to the wait staff. My husband and I were eating at a restraunt once and had terrible service( the waitress took our order and we never saw her again until she came with the bill, someone eles brought us our so-so food and yet another person brought more coffee. Not once did anyone ask how our meal was) so we tipped accordinly. The waitress actually tracked us down on the way out and pointed out that we left a small tip I informed her ( somewhat loudly) that her tip reflected her service to us that day and that we would be very hesitant to try there restraunt again because of it. Sometimes I think people in service industries ( and I work in the service industry) forget that the customer is where their paycheck comes from if enough people don't like it they won't frequent that establishment and then it will eventually close down. When I became a young adult and started paying for my food at restraunts I used to tip heavy no matter what because my parents were lousy tippers when I was young. Now I tip according to the overall service.

[ktjrdn]

Please don't leave no tip. I was a waitress for a long time. I had to tip the bar and the bus-staff every night, no matter what I made. Plus, I paid taxes on a certain amount, whether I made it or not. Minimun wages for waiters is terrible. The waiter did bring your food and take your order. He brought your drinks. He did it horribly slow and only on request, but he did the work. I say give a small amount to pay for their time only. And I wouldn't base that amount on the food - just take their actual wages into effect. but with good service and good food - I tip very generously. Plus, if I have any mess-making kids with me, I pad it even more. I often stay behind when I go out with my in-laws to tip more. They insist on paying the bill, but are horrible tippers.

[Rosetta]

Tips are often pooled among waitstaff, busboys, the bartender and the host/hostess, so when you stiff someone on a tip, you are affecting a whole group of people. On the one hand, tips should somewhat reflect the service provided, but on the other hand, the minimum wage for waitstaff is about $2.50 an hour, so they are absolutely depending on that money to make up the difference in their paycheck. I would say complain to the manager, and you should get a big discount on your bill, or a free dessert, or a gift certificate to come back another time - something nice to make up for the bad experience. And if you don't get good results from the manager, then skip the tip, and if you're really pissed, leave a comment at Zagat's or Citysearch to warn other potential customers. As a former waitress, I understand why people stiffon tips for bad service, but you don't just hit your intended target when you do it. It's worth at least trying to get a manager involved to fix the experience.

[krista]

I always tip well, even when service is bad.

But if service is exceptionally bad, sometimes I leave them a note. Or write to the manager anonymously. I've written to two managers about bad service.

[Tater and Tot]

Although speaking to the manager is great in theory, I'm not sure that it will do any good, either. As a restaurant manager, much of your responsibility is to oversee your waitstaff and your customers. If the manager isn't involved enough in the goings-on of the front of the house to see that there are unwilling servers and unhappy patrons, they are going to care less whether or not you enjoyed your dinner and your service.

I wish there was a fantastic way to get the point across that we don't tip if we aren't satisfied.

[Erin]

I, too, am a generous tipper for good service. I have talked about this a lot with my cousin who waits tables for a living. What she said agrees with Amy Jo Momma. I haven't been in the situation recently, but when it happens again I will leave a small tip or no tip, but I will be sure to tell the server exactly why they are getting the amount I am leaving. I don't want them to think that I forgot (because I'm pretty sure most modern, US residing diners are fully aware of the expectation of a tip for the server) and I want them to know that the poor service was noticed. If that means I also need to speak with their manager, then so be it.

[Kandice]

Before law school I waited tables and the waitstaff (at least back then) got taxed on 8% of the food sold, regardless of whether they made that back in tip. So, if we receive really awful service, we'll leave 8%. Or, if it's really, really, really heinous and involves many insults hurled our way, one single red penny. That way they don't think you just forgot. Now, that's mean.

[mamatulip]

How much my tip amounts to is solely based on service (and food quality). If the service is crappy, so is the tip, and if it's REALLY crappy I have no qualms about leaving no tip. Usually in that case I'll speak to a manager, though.

[Much More Than A Mom]

I always tip based on the service provided. You suck, you get only your wage. If you earn it, you get lots more.

[Amy Jo Momma]

Unfortunately, almost all the restaurants in bed with the theaters in Philly are awful! We had a similar experience a few years back when we ate at the Italian Bistro before a show.

As far as the tipping goes, I used to be a waitress and when someone left no tip, we would usually assume that they forgot. It was a lot clearer that they were displeased if they left a tiny tip.

[mrsgryphon]

As a former server/bartender I cringe at the 'no tip' people! I do, however, leave a lesser tip if the service wasn't up to standard (like in your case, Kristen!) and great tips if the server goes out of their way even the teeniest bit. Not to mention an extra wee bit because now they have to clean up the mess that our 1-year-old has made :)

[JenniferB]

I agree -- I've gotten free meals because of terrible service, and I've tipped as much as possible when they were fabulous, likewise telling management what a great server they are, so they get *twice* the tip. I definately will not give a good tip to a crappy server though, and we make sure they understand that if they want a good tip, they need to do their job.

[Kelly]

I wouldn't talk to the manager, though that's a great idea, because I'm hugely anti-confrontational. I'd stiff the tip. Tip's should be earned, and though with average service I tip pretty damned well, and great service gets fantastic tips (40-50% of the bill at times), bad service gets squat. I'm not going to encourage that kind of behaviour in a server.

[Mary D.]

I would probably speak to the manager. We've had to do this on a number of occasions... yes we often have had terrible service. Many times the manager will deduct a portion or sometimes all of your bill.

And yes, I would still leave little or no tip. I have no problem with that because the whole point of tipping is for them to do a good job and EARN a tip. They don't just simply deserve a tip for the heck of it. And if they want to whine about their low wages and that they depend on tips then they have 2 options. They can either get their butt in gear and do their job correctly or get a new darn job.

Oh and this works both ways. If we have a server who gives us really good service, then we tip higher than normal as well.

[Kristen]

I agree with Nancy that the best way to approach this is to speak to the manager....not that I have ever taken this route. Usually after a meal with lousy service I'm just anxious to get the heck out of there and can't be bothered to wait around for a manager to show up. However, I do believe in tips being commensurate with the level of service, and I'm all for a low tip in the case of substandard service. I'm usually pretty generous if the service was even average, so you really have to be pretty bad for me to stiff you (and having to flag down the waiter for drinks, bread and olive oil is pretty bad).

[Amy]

I totally would leave less of a tip; the tip is based on the service, and if they don't realize that, their loss. That waiter will continue to lose tips. C'est la vie.

[Nancy]

I do tip in every case, although a much smaller amount if the service is bad.

What I do always do if I'm going to short a waiter on the tip is speak to the manager. That way he/she has a chance to apologize and compensate, plus they can provide feedback to the waiter.

If you don't provide the waiter with feedback (directly or via the manager), they might just assume you were a crappy tipper and not equate it with bad service -- because some people just stiff on tips no matter how good the service is.