An Open Letter to the Final 2 Year Old Molar

Dear Molar:

Thanks for deciding to pop out this weekend, when we had a babysitter scheduled so we could go out and enjoy an evening out alone. Granted, it's so freaking hot outside that I'd want to be totally naked and I'd only be able to drink cranberry juice and sprite (with a TWIST thank you very much), but still. It was as night out. ALONE. Without a child.

But no. You popped through on Friday morning, leaving me with a snot-nosed, watery eyed ball of misery masquerading as a 2 year old. Oh Fun. Oh Joy. Oh and 4,000 wads of tissue and whatever else I can get my hands on to wipe off her nose.

Is it really necessary to make a tiny little nose run full buckets of clear watery snot every single time making me think that she has some sort of awful cold? And the runny poop. I'm tired of using half a baby wipe container to clean her off. Clearly, you are in cahoots with the baby wipe companies.

And now, I'm one of those moms trying to explain that indeed my daughter is NOT sick or contagious - just teething. I have to endure the eye rolls and the whipping out of the antibacterial gel everytime she touches anything or anyone. It's really quite lovely.

So, all I can say to you is that I'm glad you're the last one. And you better watch your back. Because I'll be brushing you hard every night and I'll waiting for the day that you fall out.

And I can guarantee. It won't be pretty.

Toothfully Yours,
THE MOM TRAP

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My pal Tracey over at Picture This is having a photo contest. You should check it out. She said even I can enter. And I don't take pictures. Seriously. And she says blurry pics have artistic value. And therefore, I love her. And I might win.

Comments

[tracey]

Thanks K. I hope you and your peeps come over and play!!

[Izzy]

Ugh...we're going through first year molars with much the same results. So. Over. It.

But hey! That sucker is out now. Happy days will be there again soon enough :)

[metro mama]

Oh, that miserable molar.

[Melissa]

Too funny. We are going through the same thing. I can't wait for it to finally be over.

[sunShine]

Does the teething ever stop???

[Janet]

Bless you, oh molar queen. Get that sucker the second he falls out and strangle him. Bury him in the backyard. Leave him for dead. I hate those buggers.